Amazing

There once was a man from Racine
Who was an amazing fu**ing machine
Both concave and convex
He could screw either s*x
and jerk himself off in between.
What's more amazing than a talking turkey? A spelling bee!
Every time when I see a picture of something amazing in space, I usually say “That’s totally far out.”
What’s a goat’s favorite musical?
Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dream Goat.
I was at a magic show, when after one particularly amazing trick, someone screamed out, "wow, how did you do that."
I would tell you", answered the magician predictably, "but then I'd have to kill you."
After a moments pause the same voice screamed out "can you tell my mother in law?"
The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
Watson: Sherlock, what type of rock is this amazing specimen?
Holmes: It’s sedimentary, my dear Watson.
Tea pun-packed poem for my mum's birthday card
It’s been oolong time since my mum was born,

About Six-tea years to date,

Chai as you might, you can’t possible list,

her cupious amazing traits

Her balanced demeanour

Her Kindness and (earl) grace,

rooibost sense of humour,

too many to name in this teany space,

to pekoe out just a few does not do her justice,

let’s not stir things up and cause more of a ruckus,

While this ode may be (chamo)miles away from a Maya Angelou,

It’s just an obnoxious way to say how very matcha I love you.
Why is a river an amazing roommate?
He just likes to go with the flow.
Wolves love taking woofles for breakfast, they are sweet and amazing.
What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
Why are spiders such great volleyball players? Because they have an amazing topspin.
What's more amazing than a talking bat? A spelling bee!
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"
Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."