Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan.
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
How hot does your gas oven get?
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf? [ No! ] Its okay, the other two pigs said no too!
I dreamt about you. You died.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
You're that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn't need you.
Excuse me, I just farted over there. Can I stand here with you?
You looking at me is making me turn as red as that roasted beet salad.
You're the thought that counts!
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
Are you a durian? Because you're a total snack, but you smell like rotting flesh.
You look a lot like my next victim.
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
Is your mom a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.
For a fatty, you don't seem to sweat much.
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
I'd drink your bathwater.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
Are you crippling depression and anxiety? Because you haunt me at every waking hour.
What's a slut like you doing in a classy joint like this?
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
Wow, you have a the chin of Superman. I bet you could take a serious punch.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do I smell like your mom/dad?
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
The fact that I'm missing some teeth only means that there's more room for your tongue.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Antarctica is hot compared to you.
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
Are you ice cream? Because your face looks like rocky road.
I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
My feelings of love for you are like the stars in the sky. They're probably long dead.
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?
You smell... We should go take a shower together.
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?