Yourself Jokes

"Being a good husband is like being a standup comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner." — Jerry Seinfeld
"Learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself."
~ Anonymous
“Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.” – Scott Adams
“The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” — Oscar Wilde
I like the way you espresso yourself.
I like the way you espresso yourself.
“If you are not killing plants, you are not really stretching yourself as a gardener.”
— J.C. Raulston
Would you describe yourself as a ternary? Because you have a lovely form.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
"Mom Pro Tip – If you’re old enough to critique what I put in your lunch, you’re old enough to make it yourself." – Unknown
"Parenting is basically just listening to yourself talk because nobody else is." - Unknown
“You know your life has changed when going to the grocery store by yourself is a vacation.” - Anonymous
“I used to believe my father about everything, but then I had children myself and now I see how much stuff you make up just to keep yourself from going crazy.”

- Brian Andreas.
“Every pizza is a personal pizza if you try hard and believe in yourself.”
― Bill Murray
“You can always tell a real friend: when you’ve made a fool of yourself he doesn’t feel you’ve done a permanent job.”
– Laurence J. Peter
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