Wooden Jokes

If the wooden face mask was popularized by Jacques Plante, was the wooden
cup made popular by Jock Plank?
What happened to the wooden car with wooden wheels and wooden engine? it wooden go!
What do you call a cop with a wooden leg?
Officer.
I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today.
It was clogged.
I can’t decide how to finish this wooden sign telling my parrot that she’s become a member of the Scottish aristocracy
Polyurethane?
Why are wooden hard drives so bad?
They're all bark and no byte.
What happened to the wooden car with a wooden engine and wheels? It wooden go at all.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
Why can't you use a wooden spoon in a Teflon pan?
Because its non stick.
"Do you know what breakfast cereal is made of? It's made of all those little curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners!"
— Roald Dahl
My wife chose a new dining table with a metal frame instead of a wooden one
I complimented her on picking an unteak.
There's a group of guys that assemble wooden furniture for fun.
I hope they let me join.
I used to be engaged to a girl with a wooden leg.
But I broke it off.
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