Rush

Why did the train have to rush to the bathroom?
It’s been toot toot tootin all day long!
What did the monster say when he saw a rush hour train full of passengers? Oh good! A chew chew train!
Why did the wizard rush to the hospital?
He had a staff infection.
Don’t pass on this party – rush on over.
Why did DPD rush to Coors Field?
They heard somebody stole third base.
“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?”
Robin Williams
Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?
Robin Williams
A man and his wife are playing Dungeons and Dragons together...
During the man's turn, he rolls his D20 and rolls a 1. Simultaneously, he stubs his toe against the table leg so hard that his toe essentially falls off. Blood everywhere. The wife has to rush them both to the ER.

She's waiting.

She's waiting...

The doctor emerges, and the wife rushes over. "How is my husband? What's his condition?"

The doctor replies: "Critical, miss."