Major Jokes

A major produce organization is reeling after multiple reports of tainted lettuce.
We may soon witness the falling of the Romaine Empire.
Why did the hot dog turn down a chance to star in a major motion picture? None of the rolls (roles) were good enough.
Why should anyone experiment with thin ice?
It’s the best way to achieve a major breakthrough.
Why did the hot dog turn down a chance to star in a major motion picture? None of the rolls (roles) were good enough.
You must be a C major scale... All natural.
I C Major potential in us getting together.
How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.
hy don’t calculus major throw house parties?
Because they know firsthand that it’s a bad idea to drive and derive.
After hearing about my history major, my dad said, “You should go visit Italy in late August.Then you can witness The Fall of Rome."
I've removed all the black keys from my piano
Hopefully I'll C Major improvement!
What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major.
How do you get an Art Major off your front door step?
Pay for the PIZZA!
The 10 Second Rule Two friends go skydiving. This is the first solo jump for the both of them. The plane lifts off and the instructor gives them their last instructions: "When the light above the door turns green, you can jump." The first guy (who is a major stutterer) asks: "w-w-w-will the p-p-p-parach-ch-ute open o-o-on its o-o-o-own?" The instructor says: "No sir, you have to pull the chord yourself. Just jump out, count to ten and then pull the chord." The light turns green and the second guy jumps first. After ten seconds he opens his parachute and lands safely in an open field next to a river. After a few minutes he hears a loud splash and he looks over to the river. The first guy comes up and says: "N-n-ine."
What kind of candy is never on time? ChocoLATE
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
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