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Loose Jokes

Furniture Puns
How is a shoddy furniture manufacturer like a bag of prunes?
They both create loose stools.
Halloween Pick Up Lines
I heard there is a vampire on the loose, you better stay with me.
One Liners for Kids
Why can't you take a nap during a race? Because if you snooze, you loose!
Cowboy Puns
What song did Kenny Rogers write after his cowboy boot broke?
“You picked a fine time to leave me, Loose Heel.”
Frankenstein Puns
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
Funny Animal Poems That Rhyme
I bought a parrot but he has a foul mouth.
I let him loose so that he could fly South.
But he came home again.
This proves that I can't win.
He says the F word two hundred times a day.
He offends everybody and drives them away.
Nobody will take this bird even though I offer to pay them.
I'm going out of my mind, it looks like I'm stuck with him.
I have the only parrot on Earth that's a sinner.
If he doesn't shut up, he's going to be my dinner.
Pear Puns
What do you call a pear with loose morals?
A prostifruit.
Puns
What do you call an unpredictable, out of control photographer? A loose Canon.
Gorilla Puns
Did you hear about the gorilla with a screw loose?
He needed to use a money wrench to tighten it.
Onion Puns
I used to sell loose onions
Until I got the sack‬
Rabbit Puns
What happened when 100 hares got loose on Main Street? The police had to comb the area.
Tree Puns
What do trees write on? Loose leaf paper.
Oral Hygiene Puns
My kid didn't want to tell me that his tooth was loose.
I had to pull it out of him.
Cowboy Jokes
What song did Kenny Rogers write after his cowboy boot broke?
“You picked a fine time to leave me, Loose Heel.”
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