Day Jokes

Your feet must be tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all day long.
Hershey factories make millions of kisses a day, but I’m asking for only one.
Do you celebrate Boxing Day? Because you're the whole package.
A Hell of a Choice
A Hell of a Choice An American and a Russian, who have sinned much in their life, both die in a car accident and go to Hell at the same time. They are met at the gates by Satan, who offers them a choice: They can either go to American Hell or Russian Hell. Both new arrivals are curious as to what the difference is, so Satan explains that in American Hell you are free to do whatever you want; you'll find that we have all the finest amenities here in Hell, whatever your heart desires, you can find it here! However, you have to eat a shovel-full of manure each morning, but then you're free to do whatever you'd like. Russian hell is basically the same, but you have to eat TWO shovels full of manure before your start your day. The American is quick to choose American hell, but is flabbergasted when the Russian chooses to go to Russian hell. Several eons later the American bumps into the Russian and says "My Russian friend, Hell wasn't what I thought at all! Every day I play a round of golf on a beautiful golf course. I hang out with my friends at an amazing social club until late in the afternoon. I meet the most beautiful and charming women. Every night I have an incredible steak dinner at a Michelin Star restaurant. I honestly don't mind eating the shovel-full of manure in the morning anymore. I mean, it's no picnic, but you get used to it. One thing has bothered me all this time though, why did you choose to go to Russian Hell? Was it a mistake?" The Russian shrugs: "No mistake. This is Russian Hell, most of the time there is no shovel, and the rest of the time there is no manure!"
I don't care *how* many items you've got, baby, I could check you out all day long!
I actually prefer that life give me lemons so that I can make a pretty lady like you some lemonade on a hot Summer's day.
"From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it."
Are you teh Easter Bunny? Because you’ve spent the entire day hopping around in my head.
I am a pharmacist, I do it without breaks and I go all day long.
Are you tired? Because you’ve been running through my mind all day.
"I know your feet must be tired because you've been running through my mind all day!"
- Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
If you can tell me the difference between Flag Day and the 4th of July, I will buy you a drink.
You warm my heart more than the salted caramel hot chocolate on a cold winter day.
No costume? Oh you lucky girl, you don’t need Halloween. You look like an angel every day.
Do you need new shoes?
Coz you've been running through my mind since the day I met you.
Baby, let's make fireworks every day of the year.
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