Comes Jokes

What do you call a dog that comes back from the dead?
A zom-beagle.
A centipede was happy quite,
Until a frog in fun
Said, “Pray, which leg comes after which?”
This raised her mind to such a pitch,
She lay distracted in the ditch
Considering how to run.
Starts off in the morning, wakes up at six,
Grooms itself using its tongue and licks.
I give it breakfast with a friendly pat.
That's the daily morning of my cat.

Returns for lunch at one o' clock.
Eats milk rice and then goes for a walk.
Sometimes even hunts and catches a rat.
That's the daily afternoon of my cat.

Naps after lunch outside my door.
Sleeps so deeply, perhaps even snores.
Doesn't like the ground; it prefers a mat.
That's the daily evening of my cat.

Wakes up refreshed and comes for dinner.
Does it eat too much? Shouldn't it be thinner?
Eats and sleeps - hope it doesn't get fat.
That's the daily night of my cat.

(M. Tarun Prasad)
Why didn’t the peach do well on its ACT? Because when it comes to education, it only gets a little STEM.
I hope the next stage of your life comes with a ladder.
“It’s amazing how fast later comes when you buy now!” — Milton Berle
“Money isn’t everything, but it’s a long way ahead of what comes next.” - Edmund Stockdale
Here comes the sun of my life
"The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary."
~ Vince Lombardi
“The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application form.​” — Stanley J. Randall
When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.
“When it comes to staying young, a mind-lift beats a face-lift any day.” – Marty Buccella
"Old age comes at a bad time." – San Banducci
When it comes to mermaids growing legs, it's all in the de-tail.
Strawberries are berry healthy. They pack a punch when it comes to beating cancer and other diseases.
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