I want to play my match outdoors so I can hit the ball higher in the air. I’m not good at persuading people, so I’m going to hire a lob-byist.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
If you want to impress the crowd, hit overheads. Every point will be a smash hit.
Is your nickname cream cheese? Because you’re about to get bageled.
Too bad my serve hit the tape. Well, at least they’ll LET me hit it again.
I tried to hit the picture cleanly over the fence, but it was framed.
The guy missed both his serves on match point. I won by de-fault.
The classiest indoor tennis facilities serve bubble tea.
Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes. I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.
A man named Martin Draw was campaigning for the Senate. He printed up shirts saying “I’m with Draw” to support his campaign. The next day, he wore the shirt to a tennis tournament. When he walked up to the tournament desk, the director handed him his money back and asked him why he couldn’t play.
Djokovic to his friends the morning after winning the U.S. Open: Is anyone hungry for some Denny’s? Because I would like another Grand Slam.
Have you ever played quiet tennis?
It's just like regular tennis but without the racket.
I like my breakfast like my tennis grip: Continental.
Did you see the guy with quad-arms play tennis? He has a great four-hand.
The last thing I can remember was the yellow ball speeding toward me. I swung the racquet, and then things got fuzzy.
My friend Elmer’s has gotten really good at tennis ever since he stuck to a healthier diet and went glue-ten free.
Why can’t I ever win a game returning serve? Give me a break.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.
Two racquets started dating. Unfortunately, one was stringing the other along without any intention of tying the knot.
I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls. When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.
A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
Is there a bathroom in this tennis club? Because I’m about to drop a deuce.