A man named Martin Draw was campaigning for the Senate. He printed up shirts saying “I’m with Draw” to support his campaign. The next day, he wore the shirt to a tennis tournament. When he walked up to the tournament desk, the director handed him his money back and asked him why he couldn’t play.
I am disappointed that you are taking such a closed-stance on my footwork advice.
The walls in this tennis factory are so thin, that when I try to get some work done, all I hear is people making a racquet.
A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
Pick-up line: You might as well play be a tennis player, because I’m about to court you girl.
Djokovic to his friends the morning after winning the U.S. Open: Is anyone hungry for some Denny’s? Because I would like another Grand Slam.
If you want to impress the crowd, hit overheads. Every point will be a smash hit.
I used to hate tennis, but ever since I’ve started winning 6-0, I love it now.
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
I’d like to throw away my old can, but my pusher friend here says he loves junk balls.
The density of this concrete leads me to believe one thing: it is a hard court.
Have you ever played quiet tennis?
It's just like regular tennis but without the racket.
Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes. I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.
Is it ad-out again? I’m going to hit my breaking point.
Two racquets started dating. Unfortunately, one was stringing the other along without any intention of tying the knot.
Native Americans used to have their own professional tennis tournaments, and provided free housing to players from other tribes. They called it the A Tee Pee Tour. (No disrespect to Native Americans!)
They call me Ace, because you just got served.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
The classiest indoor tennis facilities serve bubble tea.
I want to play my match outdoors so I can hit the ball higher in the air. I’m not good at persuading people, so I’m going to hire a lob-byist.
I wish they’d change the scoring system, but tennis is set in its ways and doesn’t see the point.
I want to practice my forehand outside, but it will be wet in the morning and nice later on. So here’s the plan for today: inside-out.