Tennis is a lot like waiting tables. The most important thing to get right is the first serve.
Both tournament directors published the schedule at the same time. It was a draw.
Pick-up line: You might as well play be a tennis player, because I’m about to court you girl.
The walls in this tennis factory are so thin, that when I try to get some work done, all I hear is people making a racquet.
I’m a baseliner and I don’t know how to volley: my game would disappear if I went to no-man’s land.
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
Why can’t I ever win a game returning serve? Give me a break.
Oh, I thought I was playing the first round, but I guess I got a free pass. Bye.
I’d like to throw away my old can, but my pusher friend here says he loves junk balls.
I like my matches like my tennis balls: Pressureless.
I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls. When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
Is there a bathroom in this tennis club? Because I’m about to drop a deuce.
Too bad my serve hit the tape. Well, at least they’ll LET me hit it again.
I wish they’d change the scoring system, but tennis is set in its ways and doesn’t see the point.
You can never get short balls over the net! Solution: Drop shot from arsenal.
They call me Ace, because you just got served.
Djokovic to his friends the morning after winning the U.S. Open: Is anyone hungry for some Denny’s? Because I would like another Grand Slam.
I really hate these strings. I can feel it in my gut.
Is it ad-out again? I’m going to hit my breaking point.
The last thing I can remember was the yellow ball speeding toward me. I swung the racquet, and then things got fuzzy.
Federer is such a legend that they named the Roger’s Cup, and Fed Cup after him.