Why did the ski instructor ask for a divorce?
He found out his wife is a real flake.
How many Winter Park ski instructors does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to screw it in, and two to say, "Nice Turns, Nice Turns!"
What do the guys at the ski repair shop eat their lunch on?
Baseplates.
How did the blind guy from Denver enjoy a bit of apres skiing on Lookout Mountain during the last white-out?
He brought along his skiing-eye dog.
How do snowboarders introduce themselves when they meet somebody on the slopes?
Sorry Dude.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to the slopes?
Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
Skier: Doc, I think I'm addicted to skiing at Loveland Ski Are
Shrink: You may be going down a slippery slope. Do you feel a divide?
Why was the Copper Mountain skier taken to the emergency room?
He hurt his ski bum.
Where do ski instructors keep their money?
In the local snow bank.
Cold Ski Pun of the Day: I'm tired of slalom skiing. Alpine over another telemark now.
Chairlift Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, is it really windy up here, or are you just blowing me away?
After the guy broke his arm skiing, he realized it was all downhill from there.