What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
Why did the vegetarian stop running cross country?
He did not like the meets.
If ten zombies run after you, what time is it?
Ten after one.
What do you call a married couple who compete in the marathon side-by-side?
Running mates.
Why was the criminal dubbed the Beer Runner let go after being arrested for stealing 23 beers?
'Cause the prosecutors didn't have a case.