Someone who does not become a witch until they're old is a late broomer.
Why are vampire families always so close knit?
Because blood is thicker than water.
What does the Yeti do when he is tired?
Himalaya down.
"That was a howling adventure!" said the werewolf to the zombie.
Who's a witch's favorite movie director?
Steven Spellberg.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
What do you call a small Minotaur?
A Minitaur.
How do Yetis tell the time?
With a sasq-watch.
My wife and my friends are sick of my puns about The Abominable Snowman.
Yeti keep cracking them.
Where do Ghosts travel to for a holiday? South Aarghfricaargh.
What did the zombie bank robber say to the cops?
- You'll never take me alive.
I’ve started dating Medusa recently.
Our relationship rocks!
What is the baby vampire's least favorite fast food establishment?
Stake n shake!
Ghosts are terrible liars because you can see right through them.
What happened when the zombie refused to pay its ticket from the police?
It was facing grave consequences.
What do you call the story of a poor witch that just became a millionaire?
Rags to witches story.
Why did the Ghosts win the soccer match? They scored more Ghouls.
When the ghost went to a fancy restaurant, he decided to wear a boo-tie.
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
Why don’t skeletons do well at sports?
Because they have no skin in the game!
What does a monster wear when it rains?
His ghoul-oshes!
What do you call a criminal vampire?
A fangster.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
Big Foot has been spotted throwing tantrums and talking back to his parents.
No wonder they call him the Sassquatch.
I walked past Mozart's grave.
He was sitting up, shouting "Braaiinnss" and ripping up all his music.
I guess he's a decomposer now.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler.
What is black, white and dead all over?
A zombie in a tuxedo.
What do you call a yeti with a sixpack?
The abdominable snowman.
Did you hear that the list of famous vampires had a startling omission?
They forgot to Count Dracula!
Why do zombies only date intelligent women?
They just love a woman with brains.
There is a Giant Screwdriver attacking the city. Please seek shelter immediately. This is not a drill.
What’s a werewolf’s favorite nighttime story?
A hairy tail!
What kind of makeup do zombies wear?
Mas-scare-a.
Please stop making jokes about little people
How would you feel if a bunch of giants made jokes about you?
What sound do you hear when a Ghost explodes? kaBOOm!
Many people think that the Abominable Snowman doesn't exist...
Yeti does.
What do you call a half man half horse in the middle of an army formation?
The centaur of attention.
What’s a Spanish vampire’s favorite dance?
The Fang-dango.
What do you call a skeleton with no friends?
Bonely.
What do you call a goblin with an injured leg?
A hobblin' goblin.
What do you get if you cross a pumpkin with a bigfoot?
A Sasquash.
What do Ghosts suffer from? Saturday fright fever.
The vampires were in a mood, so I thought I'd do something to cheer them up. They were over the moon that I re-vamped their castle.
Pan wants to lead his kind to rebellion, but...
He can't get no Satyr Faction.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
I've always wondered if it was easy to catch Bigfoot...
I was relieved when my doctor told me it wasn't a disease.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
What type of art do skeletons like?
Skulltures!
A vampire returned a mirror to my shop the other day. It wasn't faulty or anything, he just said he couldn't see himself using it.
How do French skeletons say hello?
- Bone-jour!