A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called the SWAT team.
What a is ghoul’s favorite pet?
Ghoulfish!
Why does Bigfoot only leave footprints behind?
Sasquatch doesn't litter in the great outdoors.
The comedian ghost had everyone in stitches - he was dead funny.
What did the broken hearted skeleton say?
After all to-marrow is another day.
What do you call a bodybuilder skeleton?
A musculoskeleton.
What type of candy sent the skeleton to the hospital?
Jawbreakers.
What do zombies eat for dessert?
Eyes cream.
What did the zombie bank robber say to the cops?
- You'll never take me alive.
What do you call a titan that can't swim?
Titanic.
“Watch out! The road curves ahead” cried the skeleton.
“It’s spine“ replied the driver.
Finding Bigfoot will be no small feat.
What do you call a skeleton who hangs out in coffee shops and listens to indie music?
A hip-ster.
Within the labyrinthine bureaucracy prowls the deadly Adminotaur.
What do troll mathematicians like to solve?
Parabolems?
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
How does Bigfoot stay in shape?
It does Sas-squats.
Why don’t vampire’s make good artists?
Because all they draw is blood.
What does the zombie say to her zombie crush?
- Are you going to kiss me or rot?
What is a witch's favorite makeup?
A ma-scare-a.
What did the conductor say when he became a zombie?
Traaaaaaaaiiiinsss!!!
What does a monster wear when it rains?
His ghoul-oshes!
How did the skeleton baker make bread?
He Knee-d it.
Why do vampires eat lentils?
Because they are so into pulses.
Who is a ghoul’s favorite family member?
Mummy!
The zombie's had some bad news.
He's looking very grave.
What is a wolf’s favorite time of the year?
The howl-o-days.
What do zombies say to their sweethearts?
- I chew-s you.
Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
No body.
How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a werewolf?
Terrier-fied!
Why does it take so long to shave a giant sheep with normal-sized clippers?
Shear size.
What is a skeleton’s favorite mode of transport?
A scare-plane.
What do Ghosts say when they are impressed? - That was spectre-cular!
Where do bad jokes about skeletons belong?
In the skelebin.
A barber, a hairdresser, and Bigfoot walk into a bar...
You know what...I'm gonna shave this joke for another time.
What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?
A hemogoblin.
I don’t care if all of the other giants see me as a big joke for filing a restraining order on a guy I’ve got 75 feet on.
Beanstalked is a serious matter.
Why is it good to drink witch's brew?
It's very newt-tricious!
Where are werewolf movies made?
Howl-lywood.
What kind of potatoes do zombies like?
Monster mash.
Why did the troll kiss the witch?
To keep her busy in love!
In the night, a visitor came past my igloo. It was a yeti!
Not sure who left the other cooler, but thanks!
Judging by the sounds, there’s an ogre staying in the hotel room above me.
Hopefully he shreks out tomorrow.
What did one skeleton say to the other skeleton?
- You’re dead to me.
I feel like Medusa was in some rocky relationships.
Stealthy minotaurs are always camooflauged.
How do you beat a vampire at poker?
Raise the stakes!
What do you call it when the Bigfoot in charge makes pasta for all the others?
Alpha Yeti Spaghetti!
Skeleton 1: Why are graveyards so noisy?
Skeleton 2: I don't know. Why?
Skeleton 1: Because of all the coffin.
When a big giant eel takes your hand for a meal...
...that’s a moray.