Why did the skeleton go to the dance?
To see the boogie man.
What time do zombies wake up?
At ate o’clock!
What goes ‘Cackle, cackle, cackle, bonk’?
A witch laughing her head off.
What did the ghost who crashed the Halloween party say? - I’m here for the boos!
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
What did the skeleton say when he went riding on his motorcycle?
- I’m bone to be wild!
Why don’t vampire’s make good artists?
Because all they draw is blood.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler.
What do you call a mythical being working in a smoothie store?
Mejuicea.
Why did the troll fall back with his army?
He didn't want to be ogre-run by the enemy.
What do you call a rich goblin?
GOBLING.
Draw me like one of your French ghouls.
Why did the hotel staff dress as witches for Halloween?
Because they provided broom service!
What streets do zombies live on?
Dead ends.
What do you call witches who live together?
Broom-mates.
What’s a werewolve's favorite hobby?
Collecting fleas!
What type of candy sent the skeleton to the hospital?
Jawbreakers.
What do you call a goblin brigand?
A robgoblin.
What would you call a singer who's really scared of medusa?
A rockstar.
Who is Medusa’s cheesy cousin?
Gorgon Zola
What do you call a werewolf who cuts down trees?
A timber wolf.
What's a werewolf healed from Lycanthropy?
Over the moon.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
What is a skeleton’s favorite TV show?
Bone-anza!
The zombie had had a really long day at work.
She was dead tired.
What do you call someone who specializes in growing plants used in witches’ brews?
A hag-riculturist!
Vampires love corny jokes and puns. I don't think they're funny, but it's probably to do with them being pun-dead.
What is a baby sasquatch's favorite toy?
His Yeti Bear!
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
Why did the kraken eat 5 ships that were carrying potatoes?
Because nobody can eat just one potato ship.
How do you beat a vampire at poker?
Raise the stakes!
I wish medusa would stop objectifying people.
You will never see a vampire betting on the horses. They can't handle the stakes.
Which soccer position does a Ghost play? Ghoulkeeper, of course.
Why did the monster call his werewolf “Frost”?
Because frost bites!
What do you call a row of zombies?
A deadline.
Where do vampires eat their lunch?
At the casketeria.
Where does a Portuguese skeleton live?
Lis-bone
Why does Bigfoot only leave footprints behind?
Sasquatch doesn't litter in the great outdoors.
What do vegetarian zombies say?
Graaaiiinnss!
Heard a rumor of a giant butterfly in London. Probably just an urban moth.
How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a werewolf?
Terrier-fied!
What does a vampire do after taking a shower?
It stands on a bat mat.
Did you hear about the person who watched too many Shrek movies?
He ogre-dosed.
What did the werewolf say when he sat on sandpaper?
- Ruff!
What does a polite vampire say to its victim?
- Fang you very much.
Who babysits young Bigfoots?
Sasq-watcher.
Who are the cousins of the werewolf?
What-wolf and When-wolf
I’ve started dating Medusa recently.
Our relationship rocks!
What is a ghoul’s favorite snack food?
Ghoul scout cookies!