Why did the skeletons form a rock band?
They wanted to “Rattle them bones”!
The bartender told the ghost they don't serve spirits after midnight.
Who babysits young Bigfoots?
Sasq-watcher.
Where's the safest place to be in the zombie apocalypse?
The living room.
The skeleton was scared of going skiing, he didn’t want to wrist it.
What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween?
Ghoul-aid!!!
Why are vampire families always so close knit?
Because blood is thicker than water.
Why did the witch's team lose the cricket game?
Their bats flew away.
What’s a vampire’s favorite type of dog?
A blood hound.
What is a ghost’s favorite carnival ride? The rollerghoster.
Witches are always wand-ering around…
Why did the werewolf laugh while chewing on the skeleton?
He got to the funny bone.
Why are werewolves better than vampires?
Werewolves don’t have a problem with steaks.
What do you call a half man half horse in the middle of an army formation?
The centaur of attention.
Why did the skeleton climb up the tree?
Because a dog was after his bones!
What do ghosts use to keep their hair in place? Scare-spray!
What does a werewolf say in church?
Howleluia!
Why did the ghoul eat a light bulb?
Because it wanted a light snack!
What do you say when you see a stunned ghostbuster catch a ghoul?
He's a little confused but he's got the spirit.
Why did the troll fall back with his army?
He didn't want to be ogre-run by the enemy.
What do you call Bigfoot from Canada?
Sasquatch-ewan.
What do you call a cold werewolf?
A chilli dog.
Why did the troll fall back with his army?
He didn't want to be ogre-run by the enemy.
What online search engine do spooky monsters use?
Ghoulghoul.
What was the skeleton’s favorite Christmas candy?
Bone-bone.
Where do bad jokes about skeletons belong?
In the skelebin.
How do you beat a vampire at poker?
Raise the stakes!
This zombie kept cutting the line so I gave her a piece of my mind.
She said it was yummy.
A barber, a hairdresser, and Bigfoot walk into a bar...
You know what...I'm gonna shave this joke for another time.
What do you call an ogre in an accident?
A car Shrek.
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
What is a ghost's favorite place to work?
Ghoul-gle.
Witches always fly on broomsticks because they want to make a clean getaway.
Why did the zombie lose his lawsuit?
He had no leg to stand on!
What’s a skeleton’s next favorite rock band?
Bone Jovi.
Where are werewolf movies made?
Howl-lywood.
Did you hear about the vampire who only had one fang?
He just had to grin and bare it.
How did the witch invite the wizard to take an evening ride on her broomstick?
Voodoo like to ride with me?
Dracula always read the best selling local newspaper because he heard that it had a good circulation.
What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a person who makes pots?
Harry Potter
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
I heard Medusa looked really pretty.
In fact, her looks were stunning.
I don't know what Dracula's address is, but I'm pretty sure he lives on a dead end street.
Did you hear about the zombie after-school club?
It's dead in that place.
Take a vampire to a bar, and you don't need to ask what he wants to drink. He'll have a Bloodweiser.
What does Bigfoot do to relax in his spare time?
He goes bird squatching!
What job did Dracula’s son have on his little league team?
Bat boy!
What do witches' cats like to have for breakfast?
Mice crispies.
Why didn't the ghost dance at the party? He had no body to dance with.
- Do old zombie actors ever die?
- Yes, they sometimes drop a part.