What did the giant say after he ate Fiji?
- I want Samoa!
There's a group of girls that love vampires at my school. I really want to join their fang club.
What’s a ghoul’s favorite love story?
Romeo and Ghouliet!
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
What is a werewolf’s favorite tree?
A lu-pine.
What do you call a little ghost with a torn sheet? A hole-y terror.
What do you call it when a monster gets mad?
Ogre-reacting!
What do you call the story of a poor witch that just became a millionaire?
Rags to witches story.
How do you get rid of a witch’s hex?
Draw a hex-a-gone.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
How did the skeletons make s’mores when they went camping?
They made them on the bone-fire.
How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?
All her food is potion-controlled.
What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house?
The living room.
What do you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman? A dead ringer.
What is a Ghost’s favourite film? Paranormal Activity.
What do hydras fear the most?
Dehydration!
What’s a vampire bat’s favorite food?
I-scream!
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
The vampire decided to eat a throat lozenge. It was the only thing he could think of to stop his coffin fit.
What do you call a werewolf that's found the cure for lycanthropy?
A lycan'tthrope.
Why do vampires need cold medicine?
For their coffin.
Did you hear about the giant who threw up?
It's all over town!
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
Which monster did the three bears catch sleeping?
Ghouldilocks!
Skeleton 1: Why are graveyards so noisy?
Skeleton 2: I don't know. Why?
Skeleton 1: Because of all the coffin.
Which car is a Ghost’s favourite? It is between a Boogatti or a Rolls-Royce Phantom.
I don’t care if all of the other giants see me as a big joke for filing a restraining order on a guy I’ve got 75 feet on.
Beanstalked is a serious matter.
I used to fear giants.
Now I look up to them.
Why didn’t the zombie stay in town?
There was a new head strong sherif in town!
When does a skeleton laugh?
When someone tickles his funny bone.
Why was Van Helsing so dedicated to killing Count Dracula?
Because he staked his whole reputation on it!
What does the Ghost say when he sneezes? - Ach-ooooooooooooooooooooo!
Where do zombies go for beach holidays?
The Dead Sea.
Bigfoot saw me today
I bet nobody believes him.
What do you call the process of naming the various species of dwarves, faeries, trolls, etc?
Binomial gnomenlature.
What did daddy ghoul say to his youngest son?
Stop ghouling around!
Why do werewolves do well at school?
Because every time they’re asked a question, they come up with a snappy answer!
What do you call a zombie in pajamas?
The sleepwalking dead.
Has the abominable snowman called?
Not Yeti.
Why is it good to drink witch's brew?
It's very newt-tricious!
What do zombies serve at parties?
Finger food.
What kind of hats does the skeleton baseball league wear?
Skullcaps.
Why don’t people like grumpy vampires?
Because they have bat tempers.
What did the Turkey wear on Halloween?
He was a goblin.
Vampires can always Count on Dracula.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
What did the ghost do at the red light? He came to a dead stop.
We've all heard about elf on a shelf, but have you ever heard of troll on a poll?
Live to tell the tail.