What does the zombie say to her zombie crush?
- Are you going to kiss me or rot?
Where does a zombie get a spare body part
Second hand.
When the ghost saw his wife he said 'you're not just cute, you're boo-tiful too!'
How did the skeletons make s’mores when they went camping?
They made them on the bone-fire.
What do you call a werewolf that can’t decide what to wear?
A what-to-wear-wolf.
What did the witch get her cat for entertainment?
A cat-alog.
Where do you find giant snails?
At the end of a giant’s finger.
What do you call a lie told by a skeleton?
A fibula.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
Stealthy minotaurs are always camooflauged.
How does a werewolf make bechamel sauce?
They start with a rooooooooouuuuuuuux.
What do troll mathematicians like to solve?
Parabolems?
Afraid he wouldn’t get into college the skeleton spent the weekend boning up on algebra.
What do you call an ogre in an accident?
A car Shrek.
- Hey, graduate student Minotaur, what are you up to today?
- Not much, just working on my Theseus.
What do you get if you cross a witch with a werewolf?
A mad dog that chases airplanes!
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
Witch you were here.
What goes ‘Cackle, cackle, cackle, bonk’?
A witch laughing her head off.
What's the ghoul's favorite sauce?
Grave-y.
Why wouldn’t the ghost eat liver? He didn’t have the stomach for it.
How do ghosts wash their hair? Sham-boo.
Why did the skeleton go to acting classes?
He wanted tibia star.
What do you call a one-inch zombie?
Tomb thumb!
I don't know what Dracula's address is, but I'm pretty sure he lives on a dead end street.
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spare ribs.
Why do some zombies only eat the rich?
They are in the mood for something gore-met.
You hear about the werewolf who majored in philosophy?
Now he's a whywolf
It's easier to prepare meals with this new cookware-wolf.
What do skeletons hate the most about the wind?
Nothing. It goes right through them.
Pan wants to lead his kind to rebellion, but...
He can't get no Satyr Faction.
What did one sea monster say to the other sea monster when they started their new jobs as sewer inspectors?
- It’s going to be a Nessie job, but let’s get Kraken!
Did you hear about the giant who threw up?
It's all over town!
I’ve started dating Medusa recently.
Our relationship rocks!
Why did the Zombie baseball pitcher retire?
He threw his arm out.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
What's the similarity between a sailor and a thief?
Both have a phobia for sirens.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
When the ghost family got in their car, the dad ghost told the kids to fasten their sheet-belts.
What did the mummy say to the zombie?
- Stop ragging on me!
What’s a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
Did you hear about the werewolf who got invited to the dance?
He really wanted to go, but the upcoming full moon was giving him paws.
What do hydras fear the most?
Dehydration!
What did one angry werewolf say to the other?
- I have a bone to pick with you!
What do you get when you cross a vampire bat and a computer?
Love at first byte.
The skeleton was scared of going skiing, he didn’t want to wrist it.
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.