What do they call Bigfoot in Europe?
Bigmeter.
I'd advise against letting a vampire drive you home after a Halloween party. They never check their mirrors, it will drive you batty.
Why did the mummy get a divorce?
His wife was a ghoul-digger who was just after his mummy.
What do ghouls say to each other before heading out for Halloween?
May the ghouls be with you!
What do you call an ogre in an accident?
A car Shrek.
What's the slogan for the New York Demon Chomping Advocacy Group?
Gobble the ghoul.
What did the werewolf say when he sat on sandpaper?
- Ruff!
What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
How does Bigfoot stay in shape?
It does Sas-squats.
I was asked who my favorite vampire was. I said it was the Muppet from Sesame Street.
They said, he doesn't count!
I replied, "I can assure you, he does!"
What do ghouls and goblins put on their nachos?
Ghost peppers.
Scientists believe that one day we will find Sasquatch, just...
Not Yeti.
It's true what they say about scaring vampires with a torch.
You can see it in their fright of light response.
What part of the military do zombies serve in?
The marine corpse.
Who turns the lights off on Halloween?
The light's witch.
What happens when Bigfoot gets lost in the fog?
He is mist!
What should you do when you see Frankenstein walking towards you?
Make a bolt for it.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
I feel like I have seen that ghost before...I must have deja boo.
Why couldn't the little witch read her spellbook?
It was written in curse-ive.
Why aren't there more Bigfoot jokes?
There are, but they're really hard to find!
What do you learn in witch school?
Spelling.
What do you call a small Minotaur?
A Minitaur.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
Live to tell the tail.
Why don’t werewolf make good dancers?
Because they have two left feet!
Why are Ghosts in such good shape? Plenty of exorcise and a good die-t.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
On reflection, vampires aren't actually that scary.
What happens if you cross a hairdresser and a werewolf?
A creature with an all over perm!
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
What kind of pet fish did the skeleton have?
A bonefish.
What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween? Pillowcases.
The skeleton couldn't keep anything tidy because of his lazy bones.
How do werewolves stop a video?
They press the paws button.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
Why did the troll fall back with his army?
He didn't want to be ogre-run by the enemy.
When a Minotaur considers himself an optimist is it that he sees his glass as half-bull?
Why did the skeleton start a fight?
Because he had a bone to pick.
What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?
- Will you marrow me?
Please wait, bewitcha in a minute.
What do you get when you cross a vampire bat and a computer?
Love at first byte.
Where do Yetis go to dance?
To a snow ball.
What do you call Bigfoot from Canada?
Sasquatch-ewan.
What do vegetarian zombies say?
Graaaiiinnss!
A werewolf's favorite day of the week is Moonday.
Why did the skeleton go to jail?
Because he was bad to the bone.
I don't know what Dracula's address is, but I'm pretty sure he lives on a dead end street.
What kind of hat does a skeleton wear at Easter?
A Bone-et.
Tne thing you won't catch a vampire ordering in a restaurant is a stake sandwich.