What do werewolf like for breakfast?
Pooched eggs.
The skeleton ordered a cabernet wine with a full body because he didn't have one.
Why do Ghosts make such good company? They are full of spirit.
What does a heartbroken zombie say?
- I just want zombodie to love.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
What’s a werewolf’s favorite nighttime story?
A hairy tail!
Has the abominable snowman called?
Not Yeti.
Did you hear that the list of famous vampires had a startling omission?
They forgot to Count Dracula!
Did you hear about the werewolf who got invited to the dance?
He really wanted to go, but the upcoming full moon was giving him paws.
What is it called when a witch only casts spells that rhyme?
Poetry in Potion.
"This graveyard's gotten way too popular," said the zombie to the vampire.
"People are dying to get in."
What’s a monster’s favorite play? Romeo and Ghouliet.
What do you call a titan that can't swim?
Titanic.
What’s a vampire’s favorite cocktail?
A Bloody Mary.
Where does Sasquatch store his stuff while he's out on a hike?
In a big footlocker.
Why did the witch go to the doctor?
She had a dizzy spell.
Why did no one want to sit near Shrek?
He had terrible body ogre.
The skeleton was scared of going skiing, he didn’t want to wrist it.
Why do zombies speak Latin?
It’s a dead language.
Why do girl ghosts go on diets? So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
What do you call a skeleton who rings the doorbell?
A dead ringer.
What did one witch's cat say to the other?
You look familiar.
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called the SWAT team.
How did the witch feel about using her broom to do housework?
She bristled at the suggestion!
What is a Ghost’s favourite treat? Ice-scream floats.
What do you call a hairy beast that no longer exists?
A were-wolf!
Why did the vampire refuse to eat his eggs?
Because they were sunny side up!
What is the fear of giants called?
Fee-fi-phobia
Zombies are dead but they live with it.
Why did the ghoul eat a light bulb?
Because it wanted a light snack!
What do you call a bodybuilder skeleton?
A musculoskeleton.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
What do you call a duck with fangs?
Quackula.
Why was the zombie so grumpy?
He woke up on the wrong side of the dead.
What do you call someone who specializes in growing plants used in witches’ brews?
A hag-riculturist!
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
Which soccer position does a Ghost play? Ghoulkeeper, of course.
Why does it take so long to shave a giant sheep with normal-sized clippers?
Shear size.
Why didn’t the skull go to the dentist?
It was too-th late.
Last night, like every night, I dreamt I was half horse, half man.
My shrink says I'm just being self centaured.
"The Full Moon is a natural furnomenon," said the werewolf.
Why can’t skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
What do you call a very active hydra?
Hydradynamic.
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
How do you stop an Internet troll?
Seize their memes of production.
Can’t take my eyes off of her brewtiful face.
A vampire broke up with his girlfriend when she had a blood test. He told her she wasn't his type.