What do you call a skeleton with no friends?
Bonely.
Where do werewolves hate shopping?
The flea market.
The bartender told the ghost they don't serve spirits after midnight.
Are sasquatches superstitious?
Yes, they always knock on wood!
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.
What’s a vampire’s favorite cocktail?
A Bloody Mary.
When the ghost went to a fancy restaurant, he decided to wear a boo-tie.
Vampires are not even real. Unless you Count Dracula.
Why don’t people like grumpy vampires?
Because they have bat tempers.
How did the skeletons make s’mores when they went camping?
They made them on the bone-fire.
What do you call a ghost who haunts fireplaces? A toastie ghostie.
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
What do bony people use to get into their homes?
A skeleton key.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Have you heard about a man who became a werewolf?
He was distressed at first, but then he took a lycan to it.
What's a ghost's favorite makeup to wear? Mas-scare-a!
Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween?
The witches sweep the sky.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
What a werewolf movie, talk about howling!
Why didn’t the skeleton rob the bank?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did the skeleton start a fight?
Because he had a bone to pick.
If two vampires have a race, will it be neck and neck?
What do zombies serve at parties?
Finger food.
What did one werewolf say when he saw his friend?
- Howl’s it going?
The vampires were in a mood, so I thought I'd do something to cheer them up. They were over the moon that I re-vamped their castle.
Where did the ghost go on holiday? The Boohamas.
What do you call a hairy beast that no longer exists?
A were-wolf!
Why did the skeleton climb up the tree?
Because a dog was after his bones!
What was the most common game played by Greek Gods?
Hydra and seek.
What do you call a hairy monster that lives by a dam?
A weir-wolf.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
What do you call a werewolf with a fever?
A hot dog.
What cars do zombies drive?
Monster trucks.
How does a goblin eat a hotdog?
By goblin it.
I heard Medusa looked really pretty.
In fact, her looks were stunning.
What do you call a skeleton who hangs out in coffee shops and listens to indie music?
A hip-ster.
Where does Sasquatch store his stuff while he's out on a hike?
In a big footlocker.
What does Bigfoot say when he sees campers in sleeping bags?
- Yum, Hot Pockets!
How do ghosts take their eggs? Terri-fried.
What does a ghoul say when they wake up?
Gaaarrrh I love the smell of ghoul in the morning!
How do you stop an Internet troll?
Seize their memes of production.
Why did the zombie take a sick day?
She had cold symp-tombs.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
Where does a Portuguese skeleton live?
Lis-bone
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
Why do werewolves do well at school?
Because every time they’re asked a question, they come up with a snappy answer!
What do you call a male witch?
Mitch
Have you heard about the Italian Bigfoot?
The spag-yeti.