"The Full Moon is a natural furnomenon," said the werewolf.
“Watch out! The road curves ahead” cried the skeleton.
“It’s spine“ replied the driver.
The troll told his girlfriend that he was head ogre heels for her.
What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom, brrroooom.
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
Where does a Portuguese skeleton live?
Lis-bone
Who's a witch's favorite movie director?
Steven Spellberg.
Are sasquatches superstitious?
Yes, they always knock on wood!
Shrek isn't bad, but he's not that great either. I guess you could say he's medi-ogre.
I used to fear giants.
Now I look up to them.
What sound do you hear when a Ghost explodes? kaBOOm!
What did the zombie get when she was late to dinner?
The cold shoulder.
How did Poseidon greet the sea monster?
- Hey buddy, what's kraken?
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
If you encounter a sea monster, you better get Kraken!
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
Big Foot has been spotted throwing tantrums and talking back to his parents.
No wonder they call him the Sassquatch.
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spare ribs.
Ghosts drop off their babies at the day-scare centre when they go to work.
Why do girl ghosts go on diets? So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
Pan wants to lead his kind to rebellion, but...
He can't get no Satyr Faction.
What should you do when you see Frankenstein walking towards you?
Make a bolt for it.
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called the SWAT team.
Why did no one want to sit near Shrek?
He had terrible body ogre.
Halloween was nearly over, and the zombie was hurrying to get back to her tomb before the sun came up.
She was rushing so much, she didn't even notice the headstone was the wrong shape before she got in. It was a grave mistake.
Last night, like every night, I dreamt I was half horse, half man.
My shrink says I'm just being self centaured.
What's a zombie's least favorite quiz question?
A no-brainer.
What do you call a zombie DJ?
A dead beat.
What do hydras fear the most?
Dehydration!
Werewolves love their fast food.
Zombies are dead but they live with it.
When the ghost blew his nose, lots of boo-gers came out.
What is Medusa’s favorite cheese?
Gorgonzola.
Who did the ghost take to prom? His ghoulfriend.
What do you call a communist vampire?
A red blood count.
Where do you find giant snails?
At the end of a giant’s finger.
What's a ghost's favorite makeup to wear? Mas-scare-a!
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
When they want to relax, ghosts have a boo-ble bath.
What trees do ghouls like best?
Ceme-trees!
The vampire decided to eat a throat lozenge. It was the only thing he could think of to stop his coffin fit.
A pirate I know likes clothes made by an Italian fashion giant...
He dresses in Argh-mani suits.
Where do zombies go for beach holidays?
The Dead Sea.
Why did the werewolf laugh while chewing on the skeleton?
He got to the funny bone.
Why wouldn’t the ghost eat liver? He didn’t have the stomach for it.
What would you call a singer who's really scared of medusa?
A rockstar.
What do you call a werewolf that can’t decide what to wear?
A what-to-wear-wolf.
Can’t take my eyes off of her brewtiful face.
A vampire broke up with his girlfriend when she had a blood test. He told her she wasn't his type.