This zombie kept cutting the line so I gave her a piece of my mind.
She said it was yummy.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
Why did the ghoul bury the trophy?
Because he wanted it engraved!
Where do school-going vampires carry their books?
In bat-packs.
What did the grandfather ghoul say to his grandson?
You gruesome!
Whats the distant cousin of the werewolf?
The way over therewolf.
What job did Dracula’s son have on his little league team?
Bat boy!
Sasquatch often gets mistaken for Bigfoot.
Yeti never complains.
The vampires were in a mood, so I thought I'd do something to cheer them up. They were over the moon that I re-vamped their castle.
What did the zombie get when she was late to dinner?
The cold shoulder.
What do you call a zombie DJ?
A dead beat.
Why did the vampire refuse to eat his eggs?
Because they were sunny side up!
What happened when the werewolf swallowed a clock?
He got ticks.
What do troll mathematicians like to solve?
Parabolems?
Why do Ghosts avoid the rain? It dampens their spirits.
Vampires love corny jokes and puns. I don't think they're funny, but it's probably to do with them being pun-dead.
Within the labyrinthine bureaucracy prowls the deadly Adminotaur.
Vampires can always Count on Dracula.
What do you call a witch who drives badly?
A road hag.
How do ghosts find out their future? They read their horror-scopes.
What’s a zombie’s favorite toy?
A dead-y bear.
What problem do you encounter with twin witches?
You can never tell which is witch.
What do zombies say to their sweethearts?
- I chew-s you.
Did you hear the story of the little ghoul that grew up?
It became a headhunter!
My wife threatened to leave me if I didn't stop making monster puns.
So I guess our relationship might as well be ogre.
What did the ghost who crashed the Halloween party say? - I’m here for the boos!
The zombie had had a really long day at work.
She was dead tired.
What kind of jewelry do witches wear?
Charm bracelets.
What do you call a one-inch zombie?
Tomb thumb!
How does a vampire keep fit?
Batminton.
There's a group of girls that love vampires at my school. I really want to join their fang club.
Did you hear about the zombie after-school club?
It's dead in that place.
What is a ghost's favorite place to work?
Ghoul-gle.
What's a zombie's least favorite quiz question?
A no-brainer.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
Ghosts drop off their babies at the day-scare centre when they go to work.
What do you call a Minotaur in a playground?
A swing and a myth.
If you're wondering if someone's become a vampire, there's an easy way to tell. A true vampire is always coffin.
What do you call a half man half horse in the middle of an army formation?
The centaur of attention.
A witch with chickenpox is called an itchy-witchy.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
What did the ghost teacher say to her class? - Look at the board and I’ll go through it, again.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
What do you call a werewolf that can’t decide what to wear?
A what-to-wear-wolf.
Werewolves keep their spare things in a were-house.
How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?
All her food is potion-controlled.
Did you hear about the giant who threw up?
It's all over town!
What is an ogre's favorite snack?
Y-ogre-t.
What do witches put on their bagels?
Scream cheese.
Why do some zombies only eat the rich?
They are in the mood for something gore-met.