Sasquatch often gets mistaken for Bigfoot.
Yeti never complains.
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
What’s a monster’s favorite play? Romeo and Ghouliet.
If you're wondering if someone's become a vampire, there's an easy way to tell. A true vampire is always coffin.
What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?
She witch-hiked.
Why are Ghosts in such good shape? Plenty of exorcise and a good die-t.
How are zombies like computers?
They use mega-bites!
What do you call a rich goblin?
GOBLING.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
What do you call a werewolf that's found the cure for lycanthropy?
A lycan'tthrope.
Why are vampire families always so close knit?
Because blood is thicker than water.
Panda ghosts love to eat bam-boo.
Why do trolls live under bridges?
To troll goats!
How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?
All her food is potion-controlled.
The skeleton ordered a cabernet wine with a full body because he didn't have one.
What did the werewolf say when he sat on sandpaper?
- Ruff!
What crosswords do zombies like?
Crypt-ic ones.
Why do ghosts like elevators? They raise their spirits.
I met a French vampire who had an attention deficit problem. We called him Drac..ooh la la!
What did one angry werewolf say to the other?
- I have a bone to pick with you!
Pan wants to lead his kind to rebellion, but...
He can't get no Satyr Faction.
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
How does Bigfoot stay in shape?
It does Sas-squats.
Why did the monster call his werewolf “Frost”?
Because frost bites!
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
My friend who's a vampire was feeling a bit low. I told him to drink B positive.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
What kind of horse does a ghost ride? A nightmare.
Hear about the race between the Yeti and the Sasquatch?
The Sasquatch won, by a big foot.
What did the ghost teacher say to her class? - Look at the board and I’ll go through it, again.
How do you kill a southern vampire?
You bless his heart.
Which is a Ghost’s favourite cheese? Ghoul-da Cheese.
What is a Ghost’s favourite film? Paranormal Activity.
How do you beat a vampire at poker?
Raise the stakes!
Who's a witch's favorite movie director?
Steven Spellberg.
How is Big Foot so good at rock climbing?
He always finds the biggest footholds.
The zombie worked for years to win this prize. He showed real dead-ication.
Did you hear how the zombie bodybuilder hurt his back?
He was dead lifting.
What do you do with a green ghoul?
Wait until it ripens!
What does the zombie say to her zombie crush?
- Are you going to kiss me or rot?
Why do witches not wear a regular hat?
Because there's no point in it.
Who is the most famous French skeleton?
Napolean Bone-aparte.
What kind of jokes do skeletons tell?
Humerus ones.
- Dad, where are the DVDs? Where's Shrek, I want to watch it.
- Somewhere ogre there.
What did mother werewolf say to the naughty boy werewolf?
- We're werewolves, not swear-wolves.
Why are werewolves better than vampires?
Werewolves don’t have a problem with steaks.
Who put the Howl in Halloween?
Not ghouls just the people they ate!
How did the skeletons make s’mores when they went camping?
They made them on the bone-fire.
A witch with chickenpox is called an itchy-witchy.
What do you get if you cross a werewolf and a pet dog?
A terrified postman.