Why are ghouls so healthy?
They always eat fresh food!
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
What does one vampire say to another before bed?
- I hope you have a fang-tastic day!
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
What do you call a communist vampire?
A red blood count.
Why did the ghoul become green?
It was sick of eating brains!
What flavor of ice cream do vampires like best?
Vein-illa!
When the ghost went to a fancy restaurant, he decided to wear a boo-tie.
What do skeletons complain about?
Aching bones.
Why did the zombie stop teaching?
He only had one pupil!
I used to fear giants.
Now I look up to them.
The best place to search for information about witches is wicca-pedia.
What did the ghost who crashed the Halloween party say? - I’m here for the boos!
What did the conductor say when he became a zombie?
Traaaaaaaaiiiinsss!!!
Why was the zombie afraid to cross the road?
He had lost his guts.
I’ve started dating Medusa recently.
Our relationship rocks!
The zombie had had a really long day at work.
She was dead tired.
What is the Abominable Snowman's favourite type of cup?
A yeti.
What do ghouls say to each other before heading out for Halloween?
May the ghouls be with you!
Why was the book of incantations useless?
Because the author failed to do a spell-check.
Which soccer position does a Ghost play? Ghoulkeeper, of course.
“Watch out! The road curves ahead” cried the skeleton.
“It’s spine“ replied the driver.
Vampires are too easy to play jokes on. Suckers.
I met an annoying squid who wanted to become a comedian.
He wouldn’t stop kraken jokes.
What do you do with a green ghoul?
Wait until it ripens!
How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
He could feel it in his bones.
This zombie kept cutting the line so I gave her a piece of my mind.
She said it was yummy.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
Why is the giant afraid of Jack?
Because Jack's beanstalking him.
My wife and my friends are sick of my puns about The Abominable Snowman.
Yeti keep cracking them.
Where do vampire bats go to take out a loan?
To the blood bank.
A green ogre came up to me and began saying how stressed he was/
I said, "You're a nervous Shrek."
What cheese do vampires eat?
Munster.
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
Judging by the sounds, there’s an ogre staying in the hotel room above me.
Hopefully he shreks out tomorrow.
Why did the Ghosts win the soccer match? They scored more Ghouls.
Which monster did the three bears catch sleeping?
Ghouldilocks!
What is a skeleton’s favorite thing to do with their cell phone?
Take skelfies.
Why do werewolves howl at the moon?
Because no one else will do it for them!
What do zombies serve at parties?
Finger food.
Why did the Green Giant lay down in the field?
So he could Rest in Peas.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
Are sasquatches superstitious?
Yes, they always knock on wood!
What do witches in Australia ride?
Broomerangs.
There are two skeleton teachers at school. One is humerus, but the other is very sternum.
What kind of ghoul has the best hearing?
The eeriest!
What do witches' cats like to have for breakfast?
Mice crispies.
My friend who's a vampire was feeling a bit low. I told him to drink B positive.
Bigfoot saw me today
I bet nobody believes him.
Why don’t vampire’s make good artists?
Because all they draw is blood.