What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
What do you call a really cold, young werewolf?
A pupsicle.
Why didn’t the zombie stay in town?
There was a new head strong sherif in town!
Where do werewolves hate shopping?
The flea market.
What online search engine do spooky monsters use?
Ghoulghoul.
What is a baby sasquatch's favorite toy?
His Yeti Bear!
I'd advise against letting a vampire drive you home after a Halloween party. They never check their mirrors, it will drive you batty.
What do you say when you see a stunned ghostbuster catch a ghoul?
He's a little confused but he's got the spirit.
What did the zombie say when she fell out with her vampire friend?
- You're dead to me!
What’s a ghoul’s favorite Beatles song?
The Ghoul on the Hill!
You hear about the werewolf who majored in philosophy?
Now he's a whywolf
What streets do zombies live on?
Dead ends.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
Why don’t vampires use the front door?
Because they use the bat flap instead.
Vampires are not even real. Unless you Count Dracula.
Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man.
Why did the ghoul become green?
It was sick of eating brains!
What position does a ghoul play on the soccer team?
Ghoulie!
Did you hear about the ghoul who had eight arms?
He was very handy!
Why do witches not wear a regular hat?
Because there's no point in it.
Why does Bigfoot only leave footprints behind?
Sasquatch doesn't litter in the great outdoors.
Witch you were here.
When the ghost watched a sad movie he started boo-hooing.
What’s a vampire’s favorite type of dog?
A blood hound.
Why did the Ghosts win the soccer match? They scored more Ghouls.
I'm considering becoming a cinematografur.
Where do zombies go sailing?
Lake Eerie.
Why did the zombie go crazy?
He had lost his mind.
How do werewolves stop a video?
They press the paws button.
There are two skeleton teachers at school. One is humerus, but the other is very sternum.
What did one witch's cat say to the other?
You look familiar.
Why did the kraken eat 5 ships that were carrying potatoes?
Because nobody can eat just one potato ship.
THE KRAKEN: Yes, I'd like to renew my lease, please.
LANDLORD: Re-lease the Kraken!
- Do old zombie actors ever die?
- Yes, they sometimes drop a part.
"If you want to pass this point alive, you must answer my riddle: What goes on four legs in the morning, two legs at noon and on three legs in the evening?" the Sphinx asked.
Oedipus pondered for a moment, "Probably one of those new Pokemones," he finally replied. "There is like 600 of them.
"Fair enough man," spoke the Sphinx. "I can't reasonably expect you to remember all their names. You may pass."
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
What do you get when you cross a strict school teacher with a vampire?
Lots of blood tests.
Why did the ghoul bury the trophy?
Because he wanted it engraved!
Afraid he wouldn’t get into college the skeleton spent the weekend boning up on algebra.
Where do werewolves store their things?
In a were-house.
What kind of pasta do skeletons enjoy eating the most?
Elbow macaroni.
Two skeletons are talking in a bar.
Skeleton 1: "Are you going to the funeral tomorrow?"
Skeleton 2: “Of corpse I am.”
I've always wondered if it was easy to catch Bigfoot...
I was relieved when my doctor told me it wasn't a disease.
How does Bigfoot clear his sinuses?
With a yeti pot.
How did the skeletons make s’mores when they went camping?
They made them on the bone-fire.
What do you call a ghost of a man with a broken leg? A hobblin’ goblin.
What is it called when a skeleton lawyer works for free!
Pro Bone-O.
Did you hear about the comedian who entertained at a werewolves’ party?
He had them howling all night.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.