The zombie had had a really long day at work.
She was dead tired.
Why did the hotel staff dress as witches for Halloween?
Because they provided broom service!
What do you call a zombie DJ?
A dead beat.
What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?
A hemogoblin.
How do ghosts stay fit? By exorcising daily.
- Dad, where are the DVDs? Where's Shrek, I want to watch it.
- Somewhere ogre there.
What's the Kraken gonna give you that'll make you laugh uncontrollably?
Ten Tickles!
Why did the troll kiss the witch?
To keep her busy in love!
Are sasquatches superstitious?
Yes, they always knock on wood!
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called the SWAT team.
What does a ghoul say when they wake up?
Gaaarrrh I love the smell of ghoul in the morning!
What did the ghost who crashed the Halloween party say? - I’m here for the boos!
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
What's a zombie's least favorite quiz question?
A no-brainer.
Why did the ad agency hire a hydra?
She knew how to wear many different hats.
Ghosts drop off their babies at the day-scare centre when they go to work.
What kind of dishes do skeletons serve tea on?
Bone china.
What did one skeleton say to the other skeleton?
- You’re dead to me.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
What did the ghost do at the red light? He came to a dead stop.
Why are werewolves better than vampires?
Werewolves don’t have a problem with steaks.
What do you call half of a centaur?
A per-centaur.
What do you call a hairy monster that lives by a dam?
A weir-wolf.
What is a ghoul’s favorite snack food?
Ghoul scout cookies!
Why don’t skeletons do well at sports?
Because they have no skin in the game!
Finding Bigfoot will be no small feat.
Why did the werewolf need to talk with the skeleton?
He had a bone to pick with him.
Don't get too close to a vampire, they have a serious case of bat breath.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.
What’s a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
The best place for a ghost to go on holiday is The Dead Sea.
Zombies are dead but they live with it.
Did you see that movie about King Kong, the giant ape?
The plot was pretty bananas.
What happened to the wolf that fell into the washing machine?
It became a wash and wearwolf.
Why did the witch fall off her broom mid-flight?
She had a fainting spell!
Vampires are not even real. Unless you Count Dracula.
What did the witch say when the door-to-door broom salesman showed her a vacuum.
I don't want an automatic. I want a stick shift!
Why was the ghoul so smart?
He always ate brain food!
I have no idea how so many people didn’t make it out the labyrinth.
It only took me a minotaur two.
Why did the poor werewolf chase his own tail?
He was trying to make ends meet.
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with an ice cube?
You end up with frost bite.
What is a skeleton’s favorite mode of transport?
A scare-plane.
What does the Yeti do when he is tired?
Himalaya down.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Why are skeletons so good at chopping down trees?
They're LUMBARjacks!
A barber, a hairdresser, and Bigfoot walk into a bar...
You know what...I'm gonna shave this joke for another time.
What do zombies say to their sweethearts?
- I chew-s you.