Why was the skeleton scared of the baby?
Because he was an ankle biter.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
I wish medusa would stop objectifying people.
What's the Kraken gonna give you that'll make you laugh uncontrollably?
Ten Tickles!
Where do werewolf go if their tails fall off?
A re-tail store.
Why did the troll fall back with his army?
He didn't want to be ogre-run by the enemy.
What's a goblins favorite dinner?
Ghoulash.
Why don't zombies eat comedians?
They taste funny.
Why did the zombie comedian get booed off stage?
Because the jokes he told were rotten.
What did one sea monster say to the other sea monster when they started their new jobs as sewer inspectors?
- It’s going to be a Nessie job, but let’s get Kraken!
What did the zombie pour on her dinner?
Grave-y.
What’s a werewolf’s favorite nighttime story?
A hairy tail!
Why did the skeleton start a fight?
Because he had a bone to pick.
What cheese do vampires eat?
Munster.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with an ice cube?
You end up with frost bite.
What do you call half of a centaur?
A per-centaur.
When a Minotaur considers himself an optimist is it that he sees his glass as half-bull?
Yetis have declared their own independent state in the Himalayas.
It's an abomi-nation.
What do you call Bigfoot from Canada?
Sasquatch-ewan.
What is the fear of giants called?
Fee-fi-phobia
You can't ever get the attention of a vampire on Halloween. They're way too busy looking for their necks victim.
Where is the ghost going on holiday the next year? Lake Eerie.
Why couldn't the troll catch any fish?
Because other people took the bait.
What do you call a duck with fangs?
Quackula.
What did one werewolf say when he saw his friend?
- Howl’s it going?
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
What’s a skeleton’s next favorite rock band?
Bone Jovi.
Why didn’t the lady skeleton wear a bikini?
Because she was big boned.
What was it like to fight Medusa?
- At first I was afraid, then I was petrified...
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
What was the most common game played by Greek Gods?
Hydra and seek.
How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a werewolf?
Terrier-fied!
What do you call a skeleton with no friends?
Bonely.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
Why did the witch go to the doctor?
She had a dizzy spell.
The troll told his girlfriend that he was head ogre heels for her.
In the night, a visitor came past my igloo. It was a yeti!
Not sure who left the other cooler, but thanks!
What does a witch get if she crosses a black cat and a lemon?
A sour puss.
Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
Why are skeletons so good at telling jokes?
Because they have a funny bone.
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
How do werewolves eat lunch?
They wolf it down.
What did the zombie say when she thought the werewolf was keeping secrets?
Spill the zombeans.
Did you hear about the zombie who was expelled from school?
He kept buttering up his teacher!
What do you call a communist vampire?
A red blood count.
What do zombies call a battle between classical music composers where one of them loses their mind?
A de-Bach-le.
How do you stop a werewolf attacking you?
Throw a stick and shout “Fetch.”
Don't get too close to a vampire, they have a serious case of bat breath.
It's true what they say about scaring vampires with a torch.
You can see it in their fright of light response.
Can’t take my eyes off of her brewtiful face.