What do you call a male witch?
Mitch
Why did the zombie take a sick day?
She had cold symp-tombs.
Two ghosts were at a disco. One was having a fa-boo-lous time and the other wanted to boo-gie all night long!
What does Bigfoot say when he sees campers in sleeping bags?
- Yum, Hot Pockets!
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
What do witches in Australia ride?
Broomerangs.
What kind of jewelry do witches wear?
Charm bracelets.
Why did the poor werewolf chase his own tail?
He was trying to make ends meet.
What kind of horse does a ghost ride? A nightmare.
What happened to the skeleton who sat by the fire for too long?
He became bone dry.
What's the difference between an internet troll and a video game character?
Video game characters have lives.
What do zombies call a battle between classical music composers where one of them loses their mind?
A de-Bach-le.
What’s a zombie’s favorite toy?
A dead-y bear.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
What did daddy ghoul say to his youngest son?
Stop ghouling around!
Whats the distant cousin of the werewolf?
The way over therewolf.
The bartender told the ghost they don't serve spirits after midnight.
Vampires love corny jokes and puns. I don't think they're funny, but it's probably to do with them being pun-dead.
Why did the skeleton go to jail?
Because he was bad to the bone.
Where do Ghosts travel to for a holiday? South Aarghfricaargh.
What do you call a duck with fangs?
Quackula.
What do vampires do when they are trying to fall asleep?
Count Draculas.
Vampires make awful businessmen. They just can't deal with the stakeholders.
When the ghost went to a fancy restaurant, he decided to wear a boo-tie.
Pan wants to lead his kind to rebellion, but...
He can't get no Satyr Faction.
Which monster did the three bears catch sleeping?
Ghouldilocks!
What do you do when a ton of ghosts show up at your house? Hope that it’s Halloween!
What do you call a half man half horse in the middle of an army formation?
The centaur of attention.
I’ve started dating Medusa recently.
Our relationship rocks!
Who is the most famous French skeleton?
Napolean Bone-aparte.
What do you call a sketchy looking Bigfoot?
A Susquatch.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
What is a ghoul's favorite soup?
Ghoul-ash.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
Why did the skeleton go to the hospital?
To have his ghoul bladder removed.
What do ghouls eat for supper? Spooketi
What do you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman? A dead ringer.
An idea is one of the worst killers of vampires. They don't see it coming, and then it dawns on them.
What's a werewolf's favorite mode of transport?
A lunar cycle.
What does a monster wear when it rains?
His ghoul-oshes!
What is the highest compliment a zombie can receive?
- Wow, you're in Grave condition!
Mommy, Mommy, what’s a werewolf?
Don’t worry about that honey and comb your face!
What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom, brrroooom.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
What position does a ghoul play on the soccer team?
Ghoulie!
Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
No, they eat the fingers separately.
I don't know what Dracula's address is, but I'm pretty sure he lives on a dead end street.
What did one sea monster say to the other sea monster when they started their new jobs as sewer inspectors?
- It’s going to be a Nessie job, but let’s get Kraken!
Why shouldn’t you grab a werewolf by its tail?
It might be the werewolf’s tail but it could be the end of you!
Why didn’t the skeleton rob the bank?
Because he didn’t have the guts.