A monster terrorized a village.
He kept doing it ogre and ogre again...
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
What do you get when you cross a vampire bat and a computer?
Love at first byte.
How did the witch feel about using her broom to do housework?
She bristled at the suggestion!
What's a werewolf healed from Lycanthropy?
Over the moon.
Where is the ghost going on holiday the next year? Lake Eerie.
What kind of writer did the ghost hire to write his biography? A ghostwriter, duh.
What do you call a row of zombies?
A deadline.
A wise saying among werewolves: Chasing your tail will not make ends meet.
What do witches in Australia ride?
Broomerangs.
What is a Ghost’s favourite film? Paranormal Activity.
Why was the zombie afraid to cross the road?
He had lost his guts.
How do Yetis tell the time?
With a sasq-watch.
I feel like Medusa was in some rocky relationships.
What do you call a fast broomstick?
A vroom-stick.
What's a zombie's least favorite quiz question?
A no-brainer.
Why does Bigfoot only leave footprints behind?
Sasquatch doesn't litter in the great outdoors.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
On reflection, vampires aren't actually that scary.
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
What was the most common game played by Greek Gods?
Hydra and seek.
Why did the ghost go to the big Labor Day sale? He’s a bargain haunter.
Why do skeletons hate the cold?
It sends chills up their spine.
What did the werewolf say when he sat on sandpaper?
- Ruff!
What do you say when you see a stunned ghostbuster catch a ghoul?
He's a little confused but he's got the spirit.
What does the skeleton chef say when he serves you a meal?
- Bone Appetit!
Did you hear that the police arrested a pair of vampires?
They got them on two Counts of robbing a blood bank!
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
Within the labyrinthine bureaucracy prowls the deadly Adminotaur.
What did the zombie say when he failed the exam?
- I didn't have enough brains.
Why don’t people like grumpy vampires?
Because they have bat tempers.
Why did no one want to sit near Shrek?
He had terrible body ogre.
What do skeletons say when they set off to sea?
- Bone voyage!
I knew a vampire who was trying to become an actor. He gave it his best shot, but ended up retraining. He just couldn't find a role he could sink his teeth into.
Why do werewolves do well at school?
Because every time they’re asked a question, they come up with a snappy answer!
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
What do you call a witch's spotless garage?
A broom closet.
THE KRAKEN: Yes, I'd like to renew my lease, please.
LANDLORD: Re-lease the Kraken!
What kind of fish do skeletons like to eat?
Carpals.
What happened to the wolf that fell into the washing machine?
It became a wash and wearwolf.
What is an ogre's favorite snack?
Y-ogre-t.
What flavor of ice cream do vampires like best?
Vein-illa!
Who are the cousins of the werewolf?
What-wolf and When-wolf
I know an old man who's a vampire. He's quite long in the tooth.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
What is black, white and dead all over?
A zombie in a tuxedo.
I met an annoying squid who wanted to become a comedian.
He wouldn’t stop kraken jokes.
What do you call witches who live together?
Broom-mates.
Why are vampires like false teeth?
They come out at night.