What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Someone who does not become a witch until they're old is a late broomer.
What do you call Bigfoot from Canada?
Sasquatch-ewan.
What do troll mathematicians like to solve?
Parabolems?
Everyone loves my Halloween costume, but I still see room for improvement.
I guess I'm an ogre-achiever.
Why do ghouls like ice cream?
Because it’s ghoulilicous!
What is the difference between a deer running away and a small witch?
One is a hunted stag and one is a stunted hag!
What is a zombie's favorite kind of weather?
Brainstorms.
What did the doctor say to the skeleton who had a temperature of 103 degrees?
- Looks like you are running a femur.
Did you hear that the police arrested a pair of vampires?
They got them on two Counts of robbing a blood bank!
The ghost was told off when he spook out of turn.
What do you call a bodybuilder skeleton?
A musculoskeleton.
How do zombies introduce themselves?
- Pleased to eat you.
What happened when the werewolf swallowed a clock?
He got ticks.
What did the zombie carrot say to the lettuce?
- Give me your heads!!
What is a skeleton’s favorite type of film to watch?
A spine-tingler.
What’s a vampire bat’s favorite food?
I-scream!
How do ghouls like their meals?
Runny!
What advice do ghosts give their children? Only spook when spoken to.
What do you call a witch that lives in the desert?
A sand-witch.
Who is Medusa’s cheesy cousin?
Gorgon Zola
What do you call a goblin brigand?
A robgoblin.
You have to hunt down a troll and kill it with a gun. After you find it, you accidently lose sight of it. In rage, you fire your gun. The bullets hit the troll and it dies.
What do you tell the person who sent you on the quest?
- I lost gun-trol.
What kind of hats does the skeleton baseball league wear?
Skullcaps.
Where do fashionable ghosts shop for sheets? Bootiques.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
Where do zombies go for beach holidays?
The Dead Sea.
What do you call a cold werewolf?
A chilli dog.
The bartender told the ghost they don't serve spirits after midnight.
What type of art do skeletons like?
Skulltures!
A barber, a hairdresser, and Bigfoot walk into a bar...
You know what...I'm gonna shave this joke for another time.
These sea monster jokes are so funny.
They had me kraken!
- Dad, where are the DVDs? Where's Shrek, I want to watch it.
- Somewhere ogre there.
What do you call a werewolf who cuts down trees?
A timber wolf.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
I'd advise against letting a vampire drive you home after a Halloween party. They never check their mirrors, it will drive you batty.
What kind of tests are witches given in school?
Hex-aminations.
Where do werewolves hate shopping?
The flea market.
What does a heartbroken zombie say?
- I just want zombodie to love.
What keeps ghouls happy?
The knowledge that every shroud has a silver lining!
What does a monster wear when it rains?
His ghoul-oshes!
Whats the distant cousin of the werewolf?
The way over therewolf.
What do you call someone who specializes in growing plants used in witches’ brews?
A hag-riculturist!
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
Normal Zombies: BRAAINNNNSSS!!
Vegetarian Zombies: GRAAINNNNSSS!!
Body Builder Zombies: GAAINNNNSSS!!
Plumber Zombies: DRAAINNNNSSS!!
Conductor Zombies: TRAAINNNNSSS!!
Weatherman Zombies: RAAINNNNSSS!!
A sphinx was guarding a road when a traveler walked by.
The sphinx said to the man, "You may pass if you can answer my riddle: What is wider than an ocean, heavier than a mountain, and unbounded by the laws of physics?"
The man thought for a moment and answered, "Imagination."
"Wrong," said the Sphinx. "The answer is your mom."
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
How should you greet a Ghost? - Long time, no see.
Witches get so excited to decorate their cauldron because their favorite hobby is witchcraft.