Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
What did the guard say to stop the horse from escaping?
Halt-her!
Why didn’t the horse tell her friend she was a thief?
She didn’t want to saddle her with that information.
What do ponies look for in a vehicle?
Lots of horsepower.
Why is Pegasus so smart?
He’s all kno-wing.
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
How does a Pegasus ask her boyfriend to propose?
She says “You’ve got to put a wing on it.”
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
What did the ponies do when it was raining? Stay ind-horse.
What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him?
He herd.
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
When do vampires like horse racing?
When it's neck and neck.
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.
Why couldn’t the baby horse eat dessert?
It was foal.
Why was the pony so excited to be invited to a rally with the president?
It was a huge end-horse-ment.
How do winged horses walk if they become pirates?
Peg-asus legs.
What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino?
A horse-shoe.
What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth?
A mechanic.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
What kind of car do fancy horses drive?
Mustangs.
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital.
Why are horses so good at the shooting range?
They’re hunters.
What do horses eat with their salad? Dressage-ing.
Why didn’t the horse buy a house?
The costs were mounting.
How did the horse solve a murder?
Compiled newspaper clippings.
What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure?
“May the horse be with you.”
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
Where do horses go on vacation?
Flankfurt.
What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out?
That’s an equestionable decision.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
What was the horse’s best ballroom dance? The Foxtrot.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
How does a horse drink wine?
With a de-canter.
What’s the spiciest way to clean a horse?
With a curry comb.
What did the horse say to his friend that didn’t come party last night?
You didn’t turnout.
How does a horse get a suit fitted?
With a tail-or.
How do horses show gratitude?
Flank you very much.
How did the horse make payments?
In in-stallion-ments.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.