Works

What do you call a cannibal that works in a university?
Hannibal Lecture.
What do you call a Rabbi who works with solvents?
An acidic Jew.
What is small, has a long tail and works with the police?
A gerbil shepherd dog!
You knead me in your loaf. This one kind of works, but loaf is just a little too different from life.
What kind of dinosaur works for the police? A trisara-cop.
Did you hear about the bank that wanted to put an ATM up a tree? If it works, they are going to expand the idea to other branches.
What do you call a snake who works for the government?
A civil serpent.
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
There was an Old Man of Vesuvius,
Who studied the works of Vitruvius;
When the flames burnt his book,
To drinking he took,
That morbid Old Man of Vesuvius.
There's this subject called chemistry
how it works is a total mystery
it is an atom
says my madam
but all I see is my misery.

(By Faaizah)
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define "Great" he said,
"I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
A komodo dragon works security cameras at a store for other komodo dragons. Mostly, he makes sure no other dragon is spying on the customers.
He's a monitor monitor monitoring a monitor for monitoring monitors.
A komodo dragon works security cameras at a store for other komodo dragons. Mostly, he makes sure no other dragon is spying on the customers.
He's a monitor monitor monitoring a monitor for monitoring monitors.
If a woman with big breasts works at Hooters, where does someone with one leg work?
IHOP.
I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works.