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Use Jokes

Elf Puns
What kind of money do elves use?
Cold cash!
Pot Puns
What will a chinese grill use when a wok is too slow
A wun.
I was watching a new cooking show where you only get to pick one pan to use the whole time…
It's called, "Do You Have The Skillet Takes?!"
Movie Pick Up Lines
"Do you have a cell phone I could use?"
"Why?"
"Someone has to call God and tell him that one of his angels is missing."
- Couples Retreat (2009)
Funny Health Quotes
"Avoid any diet that discourages the use of hot fudge"- Don Kardong
"Men make use of their illnesses at least as much as they are made use of by them." - Aldous Huxley
Thanksgiving Pick Up Lines
I use homemade pumpkin spice. Would you like to try some?
Tableware Puns
My dad kept calling referring to this mason jar as his “boom box”.
When I asked him why, he responded “I use it for all my jams!”
Why did the blind man always use paper cups?
He has no need for glasses.
Food Quotes
"When we put vegetables up for the winter, we use jars, but we call it canning. I find that jarring. And uncanny."
– Greg Tamblyn
Language Pick Up Lines
You're so amazing that I always use the partitive genitive when I talk about you.
Is it hot in here or did you just use 'whom' correctly?
Irish Puns
What kind of spells do leprechauns use?
Lucky Charms!
Spotify Pick Up Lines
Do you use Spotify free? You should join my Premium Duo for all the features.
Easter Pick Up Lines
Are you cold? You look like you could use some hot chocolate… Well, here I am!
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