Marry Jokes

Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a common-tater.
The Prince's Curse A prince was put under a spell so that he could speak only one word each year. If he didn’t speak for two years, the following year he could speak two words and so on. One day, he fell in love with a beautiful lady. He refrained from speaking for two whole years so he could call her “my darling.” But then he wanted to tell her he loved her, so he waited three more years. At the end of these five years, he wanted to ask her to marry him, so he waited another four years. Finally, as the ninth year of silence ended, he led the lady to the most romantic place in the kingdom and said, “My darling, I love you! Will you marry me?” And the lady said, “Pardon?”
Man: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
Woman: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.
I've fallen in love- I don't know why
I've fallen in love with a girl with one eye.

I knew from the start. It was plain to see
That this wonderful girl had an eye out for me

She's charming and witty and jolly and jocular
Not what you'd expect from a girl who's monocular.

Of eyes - at the moment - she hasn't full quota
But that doesn't change things for me one iota.

It must be quite difficult if you're bereft.
If your left eye is gone and your right eye is left.

But she's made up her mind. She's made her decision.
She can see it quite clearly in 10/20 vision.

She'll not leave me waiting, not left in the lurch
If she looks slightly sideways she'll see me in church.

I'll marry my true love who's gentle and kind.
And thus prove to everyone that loves not quite blind.

(By Andrew Jefferson)
Why did the King of Hearts marry the Queen of Hearts?
They were perfectly suited to each other.
When can a pizza marry a hot dog? After a very frank relationship.
When can a pizza marry a hot dog? After a very frank relationship.
Which one of your children will never grow up and move away? Your husband. How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry it.
Why shouldn't you marry a tennis player? Because love means nothing to them.
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