Fortune Jokes

What do you call a food stamp inside of a burrito? An otter fortune cookie
What is a dolphin’s favorite TV show? Whale of fortune.
“Don’t believe everything fortune cookies tell you. Just because they’re sweet doesn’t mean they’re right.”
― Unknown
Opening a new shadow puppet theatre. Business plan says we'll make a fortune, but those are just projected figures.
God grant me the senility
to forget the people I never liked anyway,
the good fortune to run into the ones I do,
and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
What kind of cookies do poor people want during Halloween? Fortune cookies.
Know what kind of cookies rich people love? Fortune cookies.
What cookie makes you rich? A fortune cookie!
What’s an orca’s favorite TV show?
Whale Of Fortune.
To whom did the squirrel go to seek out his fortune.
Nutradamus.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
Are you a fortune cookie?
Because you're always wrong.
There was a young lady of Cork,
Whose Pa made a fortune in pork.
He bought for his daughter,
A tutor who taught her,
To balance green peas on her fork.
The midget fortune teller who kills his customers is a small medium at large.
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