Early

Young man, the secret of my success is that at an early age I discovered I was not God. -- Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
Why did the Archaeopteryx get the most worms?
Because he was an early bird.
Why do worms have trouble getting up in the morning? Because the early bird catches the worm.
Why do dwarves hunt dragons in the morning?
Because the early beard gets the wyrm.
Why do riot police get up early?
To beat the crowds.
Why did the ocean leave the party early?
She was getting really tide.
Why did the giraffe graduate early?
He was head and shoulders above the rest of the class.
Mom: Did you watch the movie with the little pumpkins?
Dad: I stopped it early because it was too gourdy for me.
I said to my boss the other day, "I need to leave early today, I'm going to be a father!"
"Of course", he replied. "Take the afternoon off."

When I returned to work the next day, my boss came to my desk.
"Well, how'd it go? Is it a boy or a girl?"

"I dunno", I said, "I'll tell you in nine months."
Why was Mozart a child prodigy?
All his early pieces were in A sharp minor.
Why did the engineering students leave class early? They were getting a little ANSI.
Why do dwarves hunt dragons in the morning?
Because the early beard gets the wyrm.
I left chess club early this week.
I was just so board.
The tiny bag of flour got in trouble, so his mother sent him to bread early. He kneaded to be punished.