Damn Jokes

What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
You’re pretty and I’m damn cute. If we’re together, we would be pretty cute.
Why does it take a million sperm to fertilize one egg?
They really are too damn proud to stop and ask for directions.
Damn girl, are you British?
Because you just conquered my heart
Damn girl, I must be reading a book because you are FINE print.
“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.”
W. C. Fields
Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
Milk does the body good, but damn how much did you drink?
Are you going to a beauty contest? Because you are looking damn beautiful.
Hey girl. Are you a beaver cuz damn.
Damn girl, I must be an elephant. Because I'd never forget you.
Two sociologists are sitting by the pool. One turns to the other and asks, "Have you read Marx?" to which he replies, "Yes, it's these damn wicker chairs."
"Hard work is damn near as overrated as monogamy."
~ Huey Long
Damn girl, you're lookin' sharp
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