Damn

Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
A woman is standing nude looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.
You’re pretty and I’m damn cute. If we’re together, we would be pretty cute.
Why does it take a million sperm to fertilize one egg?
They really are too damn proud to stop and ask for directions.
My magical watch says you're not wearing any panties. Oh, you are? Damn, it must be an hour fast.
Damn girl, I must be reading a book because you are FINE print.
“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.”
W. C. Fields
Two sociologists are sitting by the pool. One turns to the other and asks, "Have you read Marx?" to which he replies, "Yes, it's these damn wicker chairs."