Button Jokes

Oh my beloved belly button.
The squidgy ring in my midriff mutton.
Your mystery is such tricky stuff:
Why are you so full of fluff?
(Richard Leavesley)
There was an Old Person of Dutton,
Whose head was as small as a button,
So, to make it look big,
He purchased a wig,
And rapidly rushed about Dutton.
“The best thing to ever happen to marriage is the pause-live-TV button.” —Rick Reilly
What are the best mushrooms to have with a jacket potato? Button mushrooms!
What type of mushrooms can you put on a jacket? Button mushrooms.
If you are preparing jacket potatoes, your choice vegetables should be button mushrooms.
How do werewolves stop a video?
They press the paws button.
How did the little koala bear stop the movie? She hit the paws button.
Chuck Norris's computer has no "backspace" button, Chuck Norris doesn't make mistakes.
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
Why couldn't the blonde add 10 + 5 on a calculator?
She couldn't find the "10" button.
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T
V
V

Edit*: sorry it seems as the CTRL button on my keyboard isn't working
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
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