What do you call it when witches are optimistic about the future?
Witchful thinking.
The best place to search for information about witches is wicca-pedia.
What do you call a male witch?
Mitch
Did you hear about the witch who got plastic surgery?
She looked really good afterworts.
Witches get sore joints because they have broom-atism.
What goes ‘Cackle, cackle, cackle, bonk’?
A witch laughing her head off.
Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween?
The witches sweep the sky.
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
What do you call someone who specializes in growing plants used in witches’ brews?
A hag-riculturist!
Who turns the lights off on Halloween?
The light's witch.
What did the Wicked Witch of the West say when she extracted metal from ore?
I’m smelting!
Who's a witch's favorite movie director?
Steven Spellberg.
How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?
All her food is potion-controlled.
How did the witch invite the wizard to take an evening ride on her broomstick?
Voodoo like to ride with me?
Why are witches good at farming?
Because they love occult-ivation.
Why is it good to drink witch's brew?
It's very newt-tricious!
What do witches put on their bagels?
Scream cheese.
Why do witches only ride their broomsticks at night?
That's the time to sweep.
What do witches put on their hair? Scare spray.
How do old witches get good bargains?
They hag-gle.
What do witches in Australia ride?
Broomerangs.
Why was the book of incantations useless?
Because the author failed to do a spell-check.
How do you get rid of a witch’s hex?
Draw a hex-a-gone.
What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom, brrroooom.
Why did the witch's cat scratch her?
Because he was in a bad mewd.
What did one witch's cat say to the other?
You look familiar.
What do witches' cats like to have for breakfast?
Mice crispies.
What do you call a nervous witch?
A twitch.
Witches get so excited to decorate their cauldron because their favorite hobby is witchcraft.
What did the angry witch do after sitting on her broomstick?
She flew off the handle.
What is a witch's favorite ride at the fair?
A scary-go-round.
What sign was posted in the witches' parking lot?
Violators will be toad.
What do a witch and a candle have in common?
They're both wicked.
What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?
She witch-hiked.
What do you learn in witch school?
Spelling.
Why did the witch stay in a hotel during her travels?
She heard they had great broom service.
Please wait, bewitcha in a minute.
What kind of tests are witches given in school?
Hex-aminations.
What do you call a witch that lives in the desert?
A sand-witch.
What kind of jewelry do witches wear?
Charm bracelets.
What did the witch get her cat for entertainment?
A cat-alog.
What does a witch get if she crosses a black cat and a lemon?
A sour puss.
Why did the witch go to the doctor?
She had a dizzy spell.
What do you call a fast broomstick?
A vroom-stick.
Can’t take my eyes off of her brewtiful face.