What happens to witches who break the school rules?
They get ex-spelled.
What do you call witches who live together?
Broom-mates.
What did one witch's cat say to the other?
You look familiar.
How did the witch invite the wizard to take an evening ride on her broomstick?
Voodoo like to ride with me?
What do a witch and a candle have in common?
They're both wicked.
What do you call a male witch?
Mitch
Why did the witch fall off her broom mid-flight?
She had a fainting spell!
What goes ‘Cackle, cackle, cackle, bonk’?
A witch laughing her head off.
Witch doctors write their prescriptions in curse-ive.
What did the lost witch ask the wizard?
- Witch way to the Halloween party?
Did you hear about the witch who got plastic surgery?
She looked really good afterworts.
Why do witches fly on broomsticks?
Because vacuum cleaner cords aren’t long enough.
What did the witch say when the door-to-door broom salesman showed her a vacuum.
I don't want an automatic. I want a stick shift!
Why do witches not wear a regular hat?
Because there's no point in it.
Witch you were here.
Why is it good to drink witch's brew?
It's very newt-tricious!
Please wait, bewitcha in a minute.
Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween?
The witches sweep the sky.
What is a witch's favorite makeup?
A ma-scare-a.
What kind of jewelry do witches wear?
Charm bracelets.
What sign was posted in the witches' parking lot?
Violators will be toad.
Why did the witch's team lose the cricket game?
Their bats flew away.
What do you call it when witches are optimistic about the future?
Witchful thinking.
What do witches put on their bagels?
Scream cheese.
Why did the witch stay in a hotel during her travels?
She heard they had great broom service.
Witches get sore joints because they have broom-atism.
What do you call someone who specializes in growing plants used in witches’ brews?
A hag-riculturist!
What did the Wicked Witch of the West say when she extracted metal from ore?
I’m smelting!
How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?
All her food is potion-controlled.
Who's a witch's favorite movie director?
Steven Spellberg.
What did the witch get her cat for entertainment?
A cat-alog.
Witches always fly on broomsticks because they want to make a clean getaway.
What do you call a fast broomstick?
A vroom-stick.
Someone who does not become a witch until they're old is a late broomer.
What do witches put on their hair? Scare spray.
What do witches' cats like to have for breakfast?
Mice crispies.
What do you call a witch that lives in the desert?
A sand-witch.
What did the witch say to people who visited her house?
Come sit for a spell!
Why are witches good at farming?
Because they love occult-ivation.
What do you call a witch who drives badly?
A road hag.
Can’t take my eyes off of her brewtiful face.
What is the difference between a deer running away and a small witch?
One is a hunted stag and one is a stunted hag!
What did the tired witch do?
She sat down for a spell.
Witches get so excited to decorate their cauldron because their favorite hobby is witchcraft.
What problem do you encounter with twin witches?
You can never tell which is witch.
Why did the witch's cat scratch her?
Because he was in a bad mewd.
How do old witches get good bargains?
They hag-gle.
What do you call a nervous witch?
A twitch.
Why was the book of incantations useless?
Because the author failed to do a spell-check.
What time does the Wicked Witch have her clocks set to?
Greenwitch Mean Time.