Neighbor Dad 1: How often do you cut the grass? Your lawn looks so much better than mine!
Neighbor Dad 2: That's on a need to mow basis.
Took the family on a whitewater rafting trip, and first time we came to a sudden descent in the river, we lost everything...
That was just one of the downfalls!
What do you call a friendly volcano? Lava-ble.
Everyone said the wind was powerful. So, I went outside and was blown away.
What do you call water that is good for you?
Well water.
My boss fired me.
"Why?" I asked.
He said, "You always question authority."
"How?"
Why did the dad prefer driving in the rain?
Things ran more fluidly.
Knock Knock?
Who's there?
Hurricane
Hurricane who?
Hurry! Cane you jog away from the storm?
Why did the obtuse Triangle go to the beach?
Because it was more than 90°.
Don't get tide down.
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
A storm blew away 25% of my roof last night....
..... oof !!
What do you call it when it rains ducks and geese?
Fowl weather.
When do monkeys fall from the sky?
During ape-ril showers.
All you need is a good dose of vitamin sea.
Why did the banana tree have to make a doctor’s appointment during the hurricane? Her fruit was peeling under the weather.
Q: What is a cloud's favorite reptile?
A: A blizzard.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
Why shouldn't you smoke weed during a thunder storm?
Because lightning strikes the highest object.
What is fog's favorite drink? Mountain Dew
Why do earth science professors always talk about ammonia? Because it’s basic material.
Why does the river never get lost?
She always finds the right pathwave.
I never knew how lightning worked
Thats until it finally struck me.
I tried playing baseball in the fog today.
It was a bit hit and mist.
Over the years, my neighbour has buried his deceased pets in his backyard, and to his surprise, a plant has sprung up.
It's a Cemer Tree.
Q: What did the tornado say to the sportscar?
A: I’m taking you for a quick spin!
I wanted make a joke about the ocean, but it's too deep
How do you cut an ocean in half?
With a seasaw!
Where do fish keep their money? In river banks.
Did you hear about the metamorphosis professor who just gave up on life? He really needed a change.
Where do flowers recharge? At a power plant!
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
She thought he was too shallow.
What type of pants do rain clouds wear? Thunderwear.
Whenever I hear folksy stories about the hills, I can never get over them.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing it just waved.
I was struggling to find out how lightning works. And then it struck me.
If I could change the periodic table, I would put Uranium and Iodine next to each other.
What did the tornado say to the sports car?
Let's go for a spin!
I needed to add some grass seeds to my lawn. The only thing I could find to keep the seeds out of my flower bed was some ceramic bunnies my wife had, so I used those as a barrier.
Please don't make fun of my re-seeding hare line.
What language do things that fly in the sky speak....
Plane english
What did the water in the fire truck say when it came to a sudden stop?
I'm baffled.
My neighbors house got struck by lightning.
It hit close to home.
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
Why do flowers always drive so fast?
They put the petal to the metal.
The insane amount of rainfall in Poland did not lead the river to flood, all was in Oder.
In the mushroom bus, one mushroom said to the other, "Please scoot over, there is not mush room."
How do two rival forests get along? They sign a peace tree-ty!
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
What did the fish say when it ran into the wall?
Dam.