Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
If you go to a beach and you can see through it, you could say the coast is clear.
What do you call police obsessed with keeping good grass?
Lawn-Forcement
Why didn't the hipster swim in the river? It was too mainstream.
With the kind of weather, it was almost certain that the bride-to-be would get a hoarse throat as she walked through the rain into her bridal shower.
Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap? It was always on shale.
Why is the world so diverse?
Because it contains alkynes of people.
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
Feeling fintastic.
Why did the leaf go to the doctor?
It was feeling green
Having a dirt yard instead of grass is a bold move...
But having a giant rock is boulder.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
What is a flower’s favorite vegetable?
Cauliflower.
What do you call an Eskimo cow?
An Eskimoo!
Green seemed to disappear from the rainbow it came back in full force, olive and kicking.
Two rocks at the bottom of a mountain. First rock: Avalanche!
Second rock: Ha! I'm not gonna fall for that again!
The river turned out to be a great party guy because he just went with the flow.
What do you call the least popular color in the rainbow? The weakest pink.
I stole fire from the gods.
But I couldn't fence it. It was too hot.
Why does water never laugh at jokes?
It isn’t a fan of dry humor.
What did the rainbow say to the other rainbow? Nothing, it was feeling blue.
I was going to tell a joke about the natural disaster in the Indian Ocean
But it was too Tsunami.
Where do naughty rainbows go?
Prism
Rainbows are very uncommon, they are blue and far between.
I couldn't go out because of the blizzard. So I had to eat storm-ed buns for dinner.
What do you call a ghoul who sits too close to the fire?
A toasty ghosty.
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
What do you call a chicken that was struck by lightning?
Air fried.
I couldn't figure out why that ball in the sky kept getting bigger...
Then it hit me.
There was news of a snowstorm. It arrived white on time.
There was a rebellious lightning bolt who ended up in juvenile hall.
His parents grounded him so he struck them.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
Why is the ocean always blue?
Because the shore never waves back.
Where does a killer whale go for braces?
The orca-dontist.
What type of fruit includes Barium and double Sodium? BaNaNa.
Pink is the early bird of the rainbow colors, it's always the first to rose and shine.
Did you hear about one flower who went on a date with another flower?
It’s a budding romance.
What does a flower say when they’re offering you a job?
Take it or leaf it.
Did you hear about the flower who was struck in a hit and run?
She was leafed for dead.
I've always considered mountain plateaus to be the highest forms of flattery.
Wanna know what I said when I got hit by a water gun?
H2Oww
What did the mushroom’s sing when they won the closed-cup? - We are the champignons!
I was at a bar and heard a band playing a Queen cover. I asked them what the name of their band was. They are called the Champignons my friend.
What did the chemist cowboy tell his horse? HIO Ag!
Rain doesn’t fall. Raindrops.
How did the wife know her mountaineering husband was cheating on her? She caught Himalayan about it more than once.
What did the wise papa fish tell his son?
Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
Q: How is hurricane season like Christmas?
A: At some point, there’s going to be a tree inside your house.
Did you hear about the metamorphosis professor who just gave up on life? He really needed a change.
My wife was watching me do some DIY and she said I hammer like lightning.
I never strike in the same place twice.
A cowboy and a Mexican were walking side-by-side by a beach in Mexico. The Cowboy asked to the Mexican if the Gulf of Mexico was an ocean.
"Sea, Señor," replied the Mexican.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.