what do you call the smaller rivers that run into the nile?
The juveniles
Rivers are so lazy they never get out of their beds.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
Why was the tree so embarrassed during the winter? After her leaves fell, she felt naked.
You can’t predict wind speeds with certainty. The best you can do is make a gust-imate.
Why do sailors eat shellfish when rain is forecast?
It’s the clam before the storm.
Diving into shallow water could lead to jumping to wrong conclusions.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
Why was the dogwood always making bad choices? Because he kept barking up the wrong tree.
Every time I passed a ring-shaped coral reef with a coral rim that encircles a lagoon, I had to pay a fee. It was atoll.
What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib?
A snowmobile!
How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They're both below C level!
Looking out at the water, a father explains why the ice breaks up in the spring.
The changing sea son.
What is a tornado's favorite movie? Gone With the Wind!
Be careful out there during the snowstorm. It ain't snow joke.
What do plants and homies have in common?
I love watching them grow.
When the moisture from the sky stops falling
It really stops waning
Why didn't the mexican archer fire his bow?
Because he didn't habanero.
What did the vegan wear to the beach?
A zucchini!
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
Did you ever hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Well, well, well.
What does a dolphin say when he’s confused?
Can you please be more Pacific?
What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
Crabgrass in my lawn is always fighting to prevent good grass seed from rooting...
Guess you could say I'm caught in the middle of a turf war
Where do meteorologists like to drink after work?
The closest ISOBAR.
Are you squiding me right now?
My friends were talking about what different colours grass they preferred.
I told them they were being gracist.
I had the best ice pun to tell you…
Problem is, it slipped my mind.
If you go to a beach and you can see through it, you could say the coast is clear.
There was once a jolly happy mountain that offered fantastic advice to a grumpy hill. "Change your altitude", he said!
I've always considered mountain plateaus to be the highest forms of flattery.
Q: What did Julius Caesar’s pet windmill say?
A: I came, I spun, I conquered.
What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.
There was once a mountain biker who murdered everyone in his path because he was a clinical cycle-path!
Why do skeletons hate how wind feels? Because it goes right through them!
What did the chicken do when his shop caught on fire?
He egg-xited..
What goes hiss, swish, hiss swish every time it rains? A windscreen viper.
What did the water plant worker say when their facility flooded?
Dam.
Why did the forest ranger never put their tent between fires
because if they did the tents would be in a across fire
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!
After all is red and done, all the colors in the rainbow are equally beautiful.
What do you call an amazing day up a mountain? A peak experience.
I knew a guy that got struck by lightning twice.
It was a re-volting scene.
Why did the fold get arrested?
Because it was caught rolling a joint.
What did the rock say to the word processor?
Boulder.
Trying to get to the end of the rainbow is a gold move.
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
You have to act quickly during a flood because it's an emergent sea.