Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
Today I helped father-in-law to fix his plants
it was very grounding.
Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap? It was always on shale.
What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window?
Snow and Tell.
What did the tornado say to the sports car?
Let's go for a spin!
Q: What do you call a windmill swallowed up by a tornado?
A: A wind meal
Q: Why does it smell bad when you destroy fans?
A: Because you’re breaking wind.
Where do meteorologists like to drink after work?
The closest ISOBAR.
Why did the ocean leave the party early?
She was getting really tide.
How the tree introduce themselves to the dentist?
“Implant”
How does a rainbow greet the other weathers? With a yellow of course!
Why didn’t the two algae ever have se*?
Because they had a planktonic relationship
What did the tree do when it found that the bank had closed? It starts a new branch.
That crazy little sun of a beach.
What do you call a baby owl stuck in the rain?
A moist owlette.
What do you call an old snowman? A creek.
What do you call a snowman that tells tall tales?
A snow-fake!
Why did the sapling jump in the ocean? He wanted to swim with the manatrees.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.
As I am walking towards my classroom, I get to know that my miss-is-sippi-ng my glass of water.
What holds the sun up in the sky?
Sunbeams
What is it called when a tree stabs his friend in the back?
A be-tree-yal
What do Snowmen call their offspring?
Chill-dren.
I went to a restaurant and had a salad. Afterward, I got an intense pain in my stomach. I visited the doctor and he told me that I had grass-troentiritis.
I am still trying to launch beef and cream out of a mushroom cannon. It is not stroganoff.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snow bank.
No matter how much she trimmed the particular strand of grass, the unruly grass kept on growing- what a grass-cal!
Whale, hello there.
Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
You can virtually stay in any room. The only one you can’t is the mush-room because it is reserved for fungi.
How did the fire ant feel after the rain storm flooded his home?
Very put out, indeed!
Tropic like it's hot.
What does Santa Claus say when he flies through a rainbow? Hue hue hue, merry Christmas!
The reason the mountains are hill areas joke gets reposted so often is because it's peak comedy
What did the water plant worker say when their facility flooded?
Dam.
My son and I went camping yesterday and when he asked me how to start a campfire, I explained, "You can start a fire by rubbing two sticks together, but make sure they’re the same..."
"Then you’ll have a match."
The ocean made me salty.
Does a water bed become bouncier when you fill it up with spring water?
What is the most favourite drink of a cow? Mountain Moo.
All the grasses were bumping into each other because the grass-light wasn't working in the streets.
What do aspens wear to school? A tree-shirt.
Bill’s house was rocking last night, everyone got stoned.
Too bad Bill didn’t have avalanche insurance.
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
The river turned out to be a great party guy because he just went with the flow.
Why are small dried up river beds so cool? Because they're ex-stream.
How does a penguin build a house?
Igloos it together.
Q: How do you stop newspapers from flying away on windy days?
A: Use a news anchor!
What did Snoop Dog need to get an umbrella?
Fo’ Drizzle.
What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.