What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Nothing, oceans don't talk they just wave!
What did the beaver tell the tree? It has really been nice gnawing you.
How do you make holy water?
Make sure to boil the hell out of it.
What did the ground say to the earthquake? You crack me up!
What do you call a slow skier?
A slopepoke!
The river turned out to be a great party guy because he just went with the flow.
What do you call a gangsta snowman?
Froze-T.
Did you hear about the Spanish ocean?
Si.
What is it called when a tree stabs his friend in the back?
A be-tree-yal
I really hate rock puns.
My sediments exactly.
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano? I really lava you!
I tried to catch the fog.
But I mist.
You can bet on firemen at the beach.
It's a shore-fire thing.
Q: What do you call a gust of wind full of sand?
A: A rough draft
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
Why didn't the mexican archer fire his bow?
Because he didn't habanero.
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
I wanted make a joke about the ocean, but it's too deep
Why did the mushroom need time off work? Because he was fried.
What is a cat's favorite color in the rainbow? Purrrrrple of course.
What do you call a gestalt consciousness of plants?
A chive mind.
What did the vegan wear to the beach?
A zucchini!
What was the conversation like at the dinner party with all the boring flowers?
Like pollen teeth.
I hope it doesn’t rain Halloween night.
That would dampen spirits.
What should you do if it starts raining cats and dogs?
Please seek shelters.
I guess you could say that things hit by tornado's are blown up.
That crazy little sun of a beach.
What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib?
A snowmobile!
Q: What did the tornado say to the sportscar?
A: I’m taking you for a quick spin!
Q: Why is there so much wind inside a sports arena?
A: Because of all the fans.
What do snowmen eat for lunch?
Icebergers!
What do fashionable mountains wear when it's cold? An ice cap.
The bartender asks one of The Beach Boys what they’d like, so he looks back to his friends
“Get a round?” “Round?” “Round?” “I’ll get a round!”
What is the tree’s least favorite month of the year? SepTIMBERRRR.
Who did Prince Mushroom fall in love with at the royal ball? - Chanterella!
What is the most favourite drink of a cow? Mountain Moo.
I enjoy the cold weather
But only to a certain degree.
What do you call a funnel shaped storm made of ketchup?
A tormato.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
What do you call a baby tree struck by lightning?
A zapling.
Q: What falls but never hits the ground?
A: The temperature
How do two rival forests get along? They sign a peace tree-ty!
When does soil get rich?
When mother nature makes it rain.
What’s every ice cream parlor owner’s side hustle?
Sundae school teacher.
I won an argument about weather forecasting accuracy. My fellow debater's logic was cloudy. After his defeat, he was fuming and he stormed out of the room.
What is known as the world's wettest animal? Rain-deer.
Where do rocks like to sleep?
In bedrocks!
I needed to add some grass seeds to my lawn. The only thing I could find to keep the seeds out of my flower bed was some ceramic bunnies my wife had, so I used those as a barrier.
Please don't make fun of my re-seeding hare line.
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
Q: What do you call a gust of wind that blows a tall guys onto a basketball court?
A: The NBA draft