what do you call the smaller rivers that run into the nile?
The juveniles
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
Did you hear about the soldier who got struck by lightning?
He had to be honorably discharged.
When the AC circuits in your home are hit by a DC lightning bolt..
It's a current affair.
Why was it hard for police to catch the tree bandit? He had them stumped.
I see fewer and fewer rainbow tie-dye t-shirts these days. It's a dying art.
What happens if someone chucks a rock at you? You hit the rock’s bottom.
What do you call a Mongolian leader who got struck by lightning
Shocka Khan.
I invented beach footwear for people with one leg.
It was a flop.
What is known as the world's wettest animal? Rain-deer.
Have you heard about the street performer who does his act in the middle of a storm?
It's mime blowing.
Mother always knows best. But when winter comes around, Mother Nature snows best.
What is the most favourite drink of a cow? Mountain Moo.
I have a hiking playlist with songs from the Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem. I call it my trail mix.
What nature phenomenon is the funniest? A cyclown!
I was just telling my friend Michael Rains about my unfortunate allergy to my home-grown barley.
My grains give me migraines, Mike Rains.
Why didn't the mexican archer fire his bow?
Because he didn't habanero.
How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They're both below C level!
Why do cows lie on each other in the rain?
To keep each udder dry.
Q: How is hurricane season like Christmas?
A: At some point, there’s going to be a tree inside your house.
What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?
A mist conception.
What does a flower do when they get caught in a lie?
Backpetal.
What sort of ball doesn’t bounce?
A snowball!
I know a man whose last name is Storm
He has three daughters: Summer, April, and Haley.
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Thanks for all the sediment.
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Frosted Flakes.
The cloud hailed from the sky kingdom.
Tropic like it's hot.
There's snow place like the mountains in winter.
What did the gold say to the pyrite? You’re a fool and a fake!
Why was the Blonde fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the W's.
What does a mermaid wear to math class?
An algae-bra, naturally.
Why was there lightning and thunder in the lab?
The scientists were brainstorming.
What do you call it when you plant a tree at each corner of a house?
A fourest.
My dad's nickname is lightning.
That way I can tell my friends I've been struck by lightning multiple times.
Why do trees always walk so slowly? All they can do is lumber around.
I asked the land beside the ocean if he was certain he wasn't beach.
But he was pretty shore.
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
I think there's something wrong with the cactus I'm growing...
But I can't put my finger on it.
I was thinking of making an investment on a new farming venture that feeds marijuana to cows instead of grass.
The steaks will be too high for sure.
Why did Frosty the snowman want a divorce?
Because he thought his wife was a flake.
Q: What is a cloud's favorite reptile?
A: A blizzard.
As I am walking towards my classroom, I get to know that my miss-is-sippi-ng my glass of water.
What did the beaver tell the tree? It has really been nice gnawing you.
When can your cup of coffee tell the weather?
When it's muggy.
What do books wear on a wet and rainy day? Rain quotes.
Whenever someone wishes me to say "Happy Winter," it always leaves me cold.
I thought I was swimming in the river Thames, but apparently I made it all the way to France before I realized I'm in Seine.
All you need is a good dose of vitamin sea.