My wife drives like lightning.
I don't mean she drives fast - she hits trees.
I got camping insurance....but if someone steals my tent in the middle of the night....
I'm no longer covered.
Many people seem to believe that warm water droplets get cooled fast and form fog. It's a mist-conception. Someone should de-mist-ify it.
The feds were on a global hunt for a cow who was known to hide behind foliage. They finally located her in Moss-cow.
When you look at the sky and see the moon
You're looking at a subtle light
How do you cut an ocean in half?
With a seasaw!
The lake did not like the river because it felt that the river was not very lake-able.
My Dermatologist was fired today...
He made too many rash decisions.
The cloud hailed from the sky kingdom.
Whenever someone wishes me to say "Happy Winter," it always leaves me cold.
What is it called when a snowman has a temper tantrum?
A meltdown!
I had the best ice pun to tell you…
Problem is, it slipped my mind.
What drug is illegal in the ocean
Sea weed
What does the youngest flower child say?
Last bud not least!
What kind of bean never grows in a garden? A jelly bean!
During our journey through the savanna grasslands, we kept track of time with the help of an hour-grass.
When the storm begun, the garden party became a bit disorganized and food service was turned to a frost come frost served.
Where do fish wash? In a river basin.
What do plants and homies have in common?
I love watching them grow.
My wife said the stretch marks on her legs looked like lightning bolts...
So I said, that's because you have thunder thighs.
What did the mushroom request when booking his hotel? A shroom with a view, please!
Where do fish keep their money? In river banks.
I sang the rainbow song to a cop yesterday.
They arrested me for colorful language.
Why do trees make the worst enemies?
Because they are the best at throwing shade.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
What is fog's favorite drink? Mountain Dew
Why were the herbs not fully grown yet? They didn't have enough thyme!
What do you call a funnel shaped storm made of ketchup?
A tormato.
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
During the pandemic, all the children asked to draw pictures of the different types of grass. The children had to submit their grass-essments online.
What did Betula pendula tell her little sister when she was annoyed? Leaf me alone, birch.
What did the flower say when he saw his date?
I think you’re dandy, and I’m not lion!
Q: What's a tornado's favorite game?
A: Twister
Beach, please.
In my village, there is a farmer who takes his cows to refill their food at the grass station.
My friend, while driving through the mountains watching the leaves change: I love the winter. All the naked trees.
Me: Yeah, you can see all their knotty parts.
Why did the obtuse Triangle go to the beach?
Because it was more than 90°.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
How about the most dangerous mountain in the world? Kill-a-man-jaro.
When a mountain falls sick, it tells the doctor that he's feeling really very, very hill.
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
What do books wear on a wet and rainy day? Rain quotes.
The stormy weather affected my ability to remember my alphabets. I remember A, B, C, D, and F but I misty.
What does rain wear to a fancy dinner party? A rainbow-tie.
When were rock puns the funniest?
During the stone age.
What do you call it when it rains ducks and geese?
Fowl weather.
How does the weather tie its shoes? Witha rainbow!
What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?
A mist conception.
There is a higher chance of being struck by lightning than to be killed in a shark attack.
Shocking isn't it.