We just got a new chicken-proof lawn, it's impekkable.
Where do meteorologists like to drink after work?
The closest ISOBAR.
Are you squiding me right now?
What holds the sun up in the sky?
Sunbeams
Why did the sapling jump in the ocean? He wanted to swim with the manatrees.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
Fancy a climb? Mount me in.
What did the beaver say when it saw it's home on fire?
Hot Dam!
Why did the aspen date the poplar? She really found him to be in-tree-guing.
If you drop your white shirt in the Red Sea, what will it become?
Wet
How would you scare a snowman?
Get a hairdryer!
What do you call police obsessed with keeping good grass?
Lawn-Forcement
Did you hear of the story of the tornado? There is a twist at the end.
What do you call dangerous precipitation?
A rain of terror.
What do you call an amazing day up a mountain? A peak experience.
Humpty Dumpty had a terrible summer, but he sure had a great fall.
All the grasses were bumping into each other because the grass-light wasn't working in the streets.
What do you call a snowman in July?
A puddle.
Why is the world so diverse?
Because it contains alkynes of people.
What do baleen whales call a hook-up?
Netflix and krill.
Thunderstorms are shrewd investors. They put their money in a combination of frozen and liquid assets.
Why do toadstools grow so close to each other? They do not need mushroom to grow.
I got lost in the mist today.
I didn’t have the foggiest idea where I was.
Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap? It was always on shale.
Why did the ocean leave the party early?
She was getting really tide.
What did the cloud say to the rainbow? Thank you for adding color to my day.
The clients who buy from our gardening store are grass-ured that the artificial lawn grass would not lose its color with use.
There are more planes in the ocean than there are submarines in the sky
This much is plane to sea
Look Honey, a cactus!
I haven't seen that many pricks in one place since your family was in for Thanksgiving!
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
Salty but sweet.
What type of baseball player gives out all the water?
The Pitcher.
What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib?
A snowmobile!
Did you hear about the big company that made syrup from contaminated trees? They maple their syrup from the shelves.
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose? A collie-flower!
Why did the fold get arrested?
Because it was caught rolling a joint.
What was one raindrop overheard saying to another? Two's company, three's a cloud.
There was once a jolly happy mountain that offered fantastic advice to a grumpy hill. "Change your altitude", he said!
If there's a will, there's a wave.
There are lots of funny jokes about mushrooms that can give you stitches. However, you need to be patient enough because they need time to grow on you.
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
If I could change the periodic table, I would put Uranium and Iodine next to each other.
I have a hiking playlist with songs from the Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem. I call it my trail mix.
I always invite the mushroom to my party because he is such a fun-guy.
A plant is fine, a shrub is fine, but tree's a crowd.
We got the news of a coming flood today. The news was leaked.
What is a cat's favorite color in the rainbow? Purrrrrple of course.
Even during thunderstorms, Santa can still deliver presents because raindeers fly his sleigh.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?
Because they dropped out of school.