What did the flower do when she was challenged?
Rose to the occasion.
How can you tell that it’s Ronald McDonald at a nude beach?
Because he has sesame seed buns.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Butter
Butter who?
Butter get an umbrella, it looks like it's going to rain!
Rain doesn’t fall. Raindrops.
If the sun shines while it’s snowing, what should you look for?
Snowbows.
Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
Did you hear about the mother who gave birth to her baby while she was in the sky?
I guess you can say the baby was airborne
Next time you’re feeling down, just remember: your plants are rooting for you. Literally!
What do you call flowers who are bffs?
Buds.
What did the cactus wear with their suit?
A cactie.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
During a family discussion, my father said that grass is not greener than other plants. No one should make a biased grass-umption like that.
As I am walking towards my classroom, I get to know that my miss-is-sippi-ng my glass of water.
I got fired from the Calendar Factory yesterday
They say it's because I took a day off.
I hate windy weather. It really blows.
How did the apple tree get the job? It had the right qua-leaf-ications!
Did you hear of the story of the tornado? There is a twist at the end.
He was going to sleep in a bucket of ice.
But then he got cold feet.
I lost my cat in a snowstorm!
But he should be fine because he's a cool cat.
Where do doubtful Egyptians get their water from?
Denial River.
What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.
Q: What is a tornado’s favorite Elton John song?
A: Candle in the Wind!
Q: How does a butcher keep his tent up in a strong winds?
A: With steaks!
what do you call the smaller rivers that run into the nile?
The juveniles
What do you call a ghoul who sits too close to the fire?
A toasty ghosty.
What's all wet and likes to shake? It's an earthquake on a rainy day.
What type of weapon can you make with potassium, iron and nickel? A KniFe.
The weather man said there won’t be any rain for 6 months, but I drought it.
Did you hear about the boat that crashed into the beach?
The captain fell asleep and the crew didn't realize until they were already in the no wake zone.
The bartender asks one of The Beach Boys what they’d like, so he looks back to his friends
“Get a round?” “Round?” “Round?” “I’ll get a round!”
When is it raining money? Whenever there's 'change' in the weather.
The plant was tired of being boring.
It has decided to turn over a new leaf.
A butt lit a house on fire.
So I guess he committed Arse-on
Why do people like storm watching so much?
The lightning is quite striking!
Green seemed to disappear from the rainbow it came back in full force, olive and kicking.
What did the sarcastic otter say?
I think you’ve confused me with someone who builds a dam.
I installed a sky light in my apartment.
The people upstairs were not happy at all.
Did you hear about the soldier who got struck by lightning?
He had to be honorably discharged.
What does an alcoholic flower say when they reach out for help?
Lilac the ability to stop.
Why do cows eat grass?
I mean, someone has to moo the lawn.
My dad refused to accept that he was not hiking in a mountain called Mt. McKinley
He was in Denali.
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Why are you bringing me to this mountain river after our couple therapy session?!
Our therapist said I need to valley date you.
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker
Q: What do you call a row of 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.
What do you call a snowman on rollerblades?
A snowmobile.
What’s a bigamist?
It’s what Italians call a thick fog.
What happens if someone chucks a rock at you? You hit the rock’s bottom.
The best place meteorologists can stop to get a drink on their way home is the isobar.