After being stuck in the ice storm all day long, the man said, "I am starving. Can I avalanche?"
What is the color of the wind? Blew!
Q: What do you call a weatherman who farts while he pees?
A. Rain with a little wind and thunder.
Why do poets always write about the sea?
They just can’t fathom her depths.
Q: Why couldn’t the boy keep his documents open when he left a window open in winter?
A: Because it was too Win+D
There is a higher chance of being struck by lightning than to be killed in a shark attack.
Shocking isn't it.
My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire".
He was a great man but a terrible Fireman
Why did the leaf go to the doctor?
It was feeling green
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
One time, while visiting a river town, my brother was hungry and I fed him freshly made stream buns.
Why was the man using ketchup during the rain?
Someone said it was raining cats and hot dogs.
Q: What is a cloud's favorite reptile?
A: A blizzard.
Even during thunderstorms, Santa can still deliver presents because raindeers fly his sleigh.
Why did the vegan get fired ?
His job performance did not meat expectations.
I was at a bar and heard a band playing a Queen cover. I asked them what the name of their band was. They are called the Champignons my friend.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing it just waved.
What do you call a gangsta snowman?
Froze-T.
What happens when you’re alone and you get too cold.
You’re totally ice-olated.
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
What is the strongest creature in the ocean? A mussel!
My father decided to mow the lawn today. As he mowed, all the grass blade.
Why didn’t the flower get a second date?
He was garden variety.
Green seemed to disappear from the rainbow it came back in full force, olive and kicking.
Tis the sea-sun.
The queen’s favorite form of precipitation is the reign.
A man once said when is Monday coming? His wife said Mon-soon.
When does it start to rain money?
When there is change in the weather.
What do snowmen do on Christmas?
Play with the snow angels.
With the kind of weather, it was almost certain that the bride-to-be would get a hoarse throat as she walked through the rain into her bridal shower.
Did you know the Mississippi River is a girl?
If it was a guy it would be the misterssippi River.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
My grandpa used to cut the grass before he died
but he has been lawn gone.
What happened when it started raining coins?
It knocked some sense (cents) into the world.
There is always a first time to everything. For instance, when you take a mushroom either for lunch or dinner, you will be amazed at how magical it is.
I have a good nature joke but after listening to it, everyone just leaves.
The only way the mushroom could think of decorating his house was with toadstools.
How do you get into the mush-room? Ring the porta-bella.
Why did the river refuse to join the sea? Because the sea was salty.
It was hot today and when I went outside I saw there was a line of guys standing outside the hairdressers. I thought to myself, "Such a lovely day to have a barber queue".
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
My boss has just fired me for making too many Asian jokes.
Oh well!! That's the end of my Korea.
Two fish are swimming in a river, when one of them hits a concrete wall. He turns to the other and says: "Dam"
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
What does Santa Claus say when he flies through a rainbow? Hue hue hue, merry Christmas!
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
Q: What did the wind turbine say to the engineer after he fixed him?
A: I’m a big fan of your work!
Sea you at the beach.
Q: Why do windmills love loud, heavy rock music?
A: They’re metal fans.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.