Wind turbines don’t talk about much. They just shoot the breeze.
A friend of mine is his team's best footballer on paper. Unfortunately, they play most of their games on grass.
How do the Skywalkers like their bath water?
Luke-warm.
What do you call a human that's now a cactus?
A transplant.
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
What goes up when rain starts to come down?
Umbrellas.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
What do you call a gestalt consciousness of plants?
A chive mind.
There are so many puppies and kitties around the neighbourhood. Perhaps it is because it has been raining cats and dogs for hours.
Q: Why did the little clouds idolize the big cloud?
A: Because he was the raining champion.
When does soil get rich?
When mother nature makes it rain.
Want to hear the best rock puns? Give me a moment and I'll dig something up!
What can you do if you are the ocean?
Watever you want.
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
Where do meteorologists like to drink after work?
The closest ISOBAR.
What did the man say after he slipped and fell on the ice?
Nothing, he just gave everyone the cold shoulder.
Q: What is a wind turbine’s favorite musical group?
A: Air Supply
Q: What is the opposite of a cold front?
A: A warm back
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
Did you hear about the bank that wanted to put an ATM up a tree? If it works, they are going to expand the idea to other branches.
The river turned out to be a great party guy because he just went with the flow.
The insane amount of rainfall in Poland did not lead the river to flood, all was in Oder.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
The hiker hated the top of the mountain because it was all downhill from there!
Thunderstorms are shrewd investors. They put their money in a combination of frozen and liquid assets.
What do you call a baby owl stuck in the rain?
A moist owlette.
What do you call a deer in a storm?
A raindeer
The wind had such a great time. You could say it had a blast.
Q: What is a tornado’s favorite Elton John song?
A: Candle in the Wind!
What does an alcoholic flower say when they reach out for help?
Lilac the ability to stop.
I can't believe I can't see the bottom of the ocean.
It's unfathomable.
A mycologist is the most ethical type of scientist. They follow morels closely.
What is the the chemical formulation for candy molecules? Carbon, Holmium, Cobalt, Lanthanum, Tellerium—or ChoCoLaTe.
What kind of fire moistens?
A humidifier.
What do you call a dinosaur that got stuck in the rain?
A driplodocus.
Bill’s house was rocking last night, everyone got stoned.
Too bad Bill didn’t have avalanche insurance.
What types of books do pines read? Poetree books.
Why does water never laugh at jokes?
It isn’t a fan of dry humor.
There are more planes in the ocean than there are submarines in the sky
This much is plane to sea
I dropped my cactus the other day
Worst part is, I caught it
Where do saplings go to learn?
Elementree school
I imagined I saw a rainbow but it must have been a pigment of our imagination.
Why was the tree so embarrassed during the winter? After her leaves fell, she felt naked.
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
What holds the sun up in the sky?
Sunbeams
What world-famous rock group has four guys that don't even sing? Mount Rushmore.
What is a birch’s favorite dinosaur? The Tree
Rex.
What do you call two days of rain in a row in Seattle?
The weekend.